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Our Indian Baby Shower!

I’m back after almost a full week in Atlanta! More than any other trip home, I can truly say this one included ALL the things I love – my momma’s food, my favorite people, and pure relaxation. Sure, I worked from home a couple of days, but honestly, no one wanted me to run errands and do stuff (being a third trimester preggo will do that!), so aside from my workouts, I didn’t move around too much. While that’s not usually a good thing in my mind, I enjoyed not having to think about cooking dinner, washing dishes, doing the laundry, etc. Certainly a welcome break!

Vishnu and I flew to Atlanta for our Indian baby shower. Overall, everything turned out perfectly – the food (#1!), the venue, the decor…everything. I’m so thankful for my amazing mom and mother-in-law. They put a lot of effort into planning the perfect shower, and it showed!

If you’re wondering how an ‘Indian’ baby shower differs from any other shower, let me tell you! Gujarati (Indians who are from the state of Gujarat are Gujarati) showers incorporate a few different religious and cultural rituals. For example, Vishnu’s cousin’s wife and I exchanged a coconut and rice seven times (for the seventh month of pregnancy). I looked up the significance of this, and from what I can tell, it essentially represents the exchange of blessings, strength, etc. from a mom to a mom-to-be.

Another ritual involved Vishnu’s younger brother putting red powder on my face (and me returning the favor!). I overheard someone explaining why this is done, and apparently, it’s because he will no longer be the baby in the family, and he’s not giving up his longstanding spot without a little teasing and fun.

Other than those types of things and some additional praying for the baby (and parents-to-be!), our shower was similar to most others. We had good [Indian] food, played games, and cut/ate cake!

Overall, we felt overwhelmed by the amount of love we were showered with this weekend! It was so fun sharing our excitement with our closest family members and friends, many of whom drove or flew quite a distance. I’m so thankful to everyone who made the effort to celebrate with us…each and every person’s presence was deeply appreciated!

While I’m not a huge center-of-attention person, I honestly can’t wait for my Chicago shower now! More than anything, I’m looking forward to relaxing and spending a few hours with good friends.

And finally, a heads up to those who read MIS regularly (hi, mom!) – my blogging schedule may be off a bit over the next few weeks. We have a lot going on from now through the middle/end of May, so I’m not sure how often I’ll be able to post. However, because I have lots to share and talk about, I’m hoping for at least twice a week. We shall see!

And with that, I hope you have a happy Tuesday!

Advice for New Moms-to-Be — Part One

written by Parita 6 Comments

Whether it’s solicited or unsolicited, advice for new moms-to-be isn’t that hard to come by! If I had to guess, this is probably because moms have so much wisdom and knowledge to share. However, if there’s one thing I’ve learned over the past seven months, it’s that every single experience is different. Every pregnancy is different. Every baby is different. Every mom is different.

Despite knowing this, I still asked all of the moms I know, both veterans and those who are new members of the motherhood club, for their best advice – inspirational, practical…whatever they wanted to share.

I was blown away by the advice, wisdom, and vulnerability that filled my inbox. Some of the emails even brought me to tears!

Because every mom had something different to share, it didn’t make sense to just copy and paste everything into one post. Instead, over the next few months, I hope to share all the advice I received one post at a time.

Today, I wanted to share the words of a former colleague of mine who is a boy mom…a twin boy mom at that! She’s just such a practical and realistic individual who looks for the silver lining in all situations, and I really appreciate that about her…and her advice!

With that, I hope you find the following bits of momma advice insightful/helpful!

1. Make sure to straighten up your house and turn things off before you rush off to the hospital. My brother/sister-in-law rushed off to have their first child and left dinner on their plates and in pots on the stove for about two days. Thankfully the stove was off

2. Eat before you check into the hospital, because once you check in, you will not be allowed to eat any food until you have the baby.

3. Be prepared for the birth experience to be completely different than you expected or planned. I had complications before and after the birth which completely threw us off and ruined our memories of the birth of our twins. It was sad for both my husband and I, especially when you hear others tell their happier birth stories.

4. You and your husband will be more tired than you have ever experienced. We lived with extreme tiredness and fatigue for the whole first year.

5. Be prepared for your baby to not be “the perfect baby.” It can be devastating to have your image of a perfect baby and the first year of life shattered, but in reality, you may experience things you never expected: a baby who is sick/colicky and won’t sleep through the night for months, not meeting expected milestones, etc. We always have images of being the perfect mom/dad with the perfect baby, and sometimes it doesn’t work out that way. Make sure you are prepared for that mentally, and have a support system who is there for you.

6. Never be afraid to ask for help. Actually, ask for help often, from as many people as possible. Parents, grandparents, friends, neighbors, lawn care people, house cleaners, online meal delivery services. Use them all, and don’t be afraid or ashamed to ask!

7. Come to terms that you won’t be a perfect parent. There’s no such thing. You are going to be second-guessing all of your decisions for the next 18 years, so get used to it now. And don’t believe half of the people who claim perfect lives on Facebook, Instagram or Pinterest. They are either great storytellers or aliens from Mars. And on that note, Pinterest is both wonderful for ideas and evil at the same time because it has people thinking they have to do elaborate things to be the perfect mom (and later parent, class mom, party thrower, gift giver, etc.). Don’t fall into that trap!

8. Adult conversations with other moms will always turn into comparison/friendly competition sessions. Who had the longest pregnancy/labor; craziest delivery story; how long until the baby slept through the night; how much their husband helps/not helps; craziest thing a stranger said or did to them while pregnant/with the baby; who decided to stay at home/go back to work. I find it crazy that these stories still come up well into elementary school.

8a. The war between stay-at-home moms and moms who work an additional job (from home/outside the home) is a fabrication and completely destructive to all mothers. No matter which option you choose, the road is a difficult one. Just make sure to choose the option that is best for your immediate family, not what anyone else expects or wants you to do.

9. Be prepared for LOTS of unsolicited advice from family members, friends, (including ones with no kids), co-workers, and strangers. Some of this advice is good; other advice will downright irritate you. Most of it will be given to you with good intentions.

10. I hate to bring this one up, and I truly hope this is something you won’t have to face, but be prepared for your baby to be anything but “normal.” Both of our boys are on the Autism spectrum, and we began noticing little things very early on that we didn’t understand the meaning of until years later. My husband has said (as well as other friends with children with sensory issues, sever Autism, and food texture/digestion issues) that it was hard adjusting the mental picture of what my child would grow up to be like and be capable of doing. Not everyone has to make this adjustment, but as with anything in life, things don’t always work out as we plan.

11. The struggle of mommy brain is real! You will forget things. So many things! Sometimes the act of standing up makes you forget the thing you were walking across the room to get. Just know that you aren’t losing your mind. It’s a temporary condition that for me lasted the whole first year.

12. On a happier note, be prepared for a life-changing experience! Life as a family of 3 (or more) brings unexpected challenges (like packing the car for a trip with all of the baby gear). Your house may be difficult to keep clean, and you constantly have baby things on you or in your pocket/purse (pacifiers, toys, snacks, spit up!). Those great adult activities (nice restaurants, weekend getaways, movies) become occasional treats that you enjoy when you can get a babysitter, but the trade off is that you get to spend your time with you adorable, wonderful baby.

Happy Wednesday FROM ATLANTA!!!

Warning: Pregnancy Brain is Contagious

written by Parita 1 Comment

Pregnancy brain is a real thing. Of course, I thought I’d be exempt from this ‘condition’ that causes forgetfulness, spaciness, etc. But nope, it’s on in full force over here.

And guess what…I’m finding that it’s contagious! On Friday night, Vishnu officially caught a bit of my pregnancy brain. Or maybe we just weren’t paying attention. I’d like to think we’re better than this, so we’ll put this experience in the ‘it happened because we’re pregnant’ category.

On Friday afternoon, Adarsh (my BIL) texted our group chat asking if we were free for dinner. He and I were already at our respective homes, and Vishnu and my sister would both be getting off of work between 5-7. We agreed to meet at a restaurant called Greek Islands (in Greektown) at 8 pm.

As I read a few reviews about this place, I noted two things – it offered free valet parking and we should expect a wait.

Vishnu and left our place around 7:40. I drove and Vishnu navigated. As we made our way towards Greektown, Vishnu said to keep an eye out for Adams St, as the restaurant is located at the intersection of Halsted and Adams. With this being our first time in this part of Chicago at night, we didn’t realize how many Greek restaurants are located near this intersection. Now we know that Greektown literally means all things Greek!

Well, we got to Adams, pulled over at the ‘free valet parking’ sign, and made our way into the restaurant. The hostess seated us immediately, which I found a bit strange since most of the Yelp reviews said a wait should be expected. Vishnu even commented on how empty the place was. But we didn’t question it too much.

On their way over, my sister and Adarsh picked up our friend Mike, who was also joining us. We figured they’d be a few minutes late, so while we waited, Vishnu ordered a drink, and we both enjoyed the complimentary bread and olive oil.

A few minutes later, Vishnu’s phone rang. It was Adarsh. He was wondering where we were. Vishnu told him we were at Greek Islands and even gave a description of where we were seated. At that exact moment, I happened to look at the cover of the menu and noticed that we were actually at a restaurant called Pegasus. I showed Vishnu and mouthed, “We’re at the wrong place!” He looked at me with a shocked and slightly embarrassed expression on his face as he explained all of this to Adarsh and my sister. A little too loudly because our waiter heard and asked me if we were planning to stay. I assured him we were.

Adarsh, Aekta, and Mike eventually made their way to Pegasus, and we enjoyed a nice dinner. Only after a few laughs at our expense of course. Vishnu and I felt a little stupid and couldn’t believe we missed the big Greek Islands sign about 30 feet in front of where we dropped our car off.

Of course, we blamed the whole mix up on “our” pregnancy brain. I’m really hoping this was the cause. Because if not, we’ve got much bigger issues come July!

Pregnancy Transition – From the Second to the Third Trimester

written by Parita 2 Comments

If you asked what the most unexpected thing about pregnancy has been thus far, I would without question say how quickly it flies by. As I sit here and type up this post, I’m in disbelief that my third trimester is less than a week away. I’ll be 28 weeks next Wednesday! I should clarify that my disbelief is only mental in nature and not physical. I totally feel the third trimester quickly approaching! More on that in a minute.

All my mom friends told me that the second trimester would be the best – you have more energy, you finally look pregnant, your hair/skin/nails are strong/healthy/glowing, you start to feel the baby kick, etc. And I couldn’t agree more. My second trimester has been, dare I say, pretty easy. As I like to tell Vishnu, “This little guy sure loves his momma!”

The biggest highlight of the past few months was undoubtedly finding out the sex of the baby (FYI…we’re having a boy!). Other highlights include sharing said news with loved ones, feeling the baby kick, my emerging baby bump, attending our first (of three) baby class, etc.

And yes, while we’ve experienced so many highs, there have been a few ‘lows’ as well – lack of quality sleep, lower back pain, swollen ankles, and super painful middle of the night leg cramps. All for a wonderful cause though!

Now that the third trimester is almost here, I’m anticipating things will get…interesting. I was just telling Vishnu that sometimes I get a little overwhelmed with everything we still have left to do, and he admitted he feels the same way. Let’s be honest, it’s probably just our upcoming move in Mid-May that has both of us on edge. Thankfully, we have some fun stuff on the horizon too – two showers (which I’m SO excited about), our babymoon in Scottsdale (SUPER excited about this as well), and a coworker’s wedding (on July 3rd). Admittedly, I think I just need carve out time to organize the next few months. Just writing out everything that needs to happen before the baby’s arrival should help me (and ultimately Vishnu) feel better. Fingers crossed!

And finally, like I said earlier, my body is a little further along than my mind at this point! What I mean by this is that in my mind I’m invincible Par who can do all the things my pre-pregnancy self did. But in reality, I’m clearly not, and my body reminds of this every day! Especially in the last week or so. By the time 7 pm rolls around, I’m EXHAUSTED!

Something one of my coworkers said to me today really resonated in terms of trying to be a pregnant superwoman. She said, “If you can’t be kind to yourself, be kind to your baby.” SO TRUE! It’s hard for me to accept the fact that I can’t do all the things I used to…at least not at the same pace. But for the sake of the baby, I have to. He needs his momma to calm down and relax!

What does this mean? Well for starters, it means I literally need to slow down and not rush around from here to there. For example, I realized on my walk to and from work the other day that I power walk when I don’t need to. No one cares if I get to the office at 8:10 versus 8:00. I’m also giving up on the idea of cooking new/unique meals most nights of the week. We’ll still be eating healthy meals at home, but I’m going to rely on leftovers and super easy crock pot recipes until July…and likely afterwards! I want to make more time for myself as well – reading books, watching TV/movies, sleeping in (when possible), etc. And finally, I’m going to stop stressing about things that are out of my control (this one is mostly related to work). Work is extremely busy right now, and while that’s great, I need to keep things in perspective. There’s no point in overthinking things or stretching myself too thin…work will always be there!

Third trimester preggo Par is learning to slow down, go with the flow, and say f*** it! It may take a few practice rounds, but I’ll get there!

And that, my friends, is my transition from the second to the third trimester in a nut shell. Wish me luck!

A Review of Yeah Baby! by Jillian Michaels

written by Parita 9 Comments

When I first found out we were pregnant, I researched all of the best books for moms-to-be. And then, in all honesty, I felt a little overwhelmed. So I stopped Googling, and instead, ordered just one book – Yeah Baby! by Jillian Michaels.

As some of you may recall, I have a bit of a love/dislike relationship with Jillian. I love her workouts and her overall approach to fitness, but I often find myself getting annoyed by her personal stories. They come off a bit privileged to me. With that being said, when I first heard about this book while listening to her podcast, I almost dismissed it. However, the information shared definitely drew me in and prompted me to read a few reviews. So at about eight weeks pregnant, I ordered Yeah Baby!.

I have to start off by sharing that I actually love this book. For many reasons. Of course, there are a few things that didn’t really resonate, but those were truly far and few between.

What I loved about Yeah Baby!:

The tone in which it’s written. It’s very Jillian, which in this case, I actually like. You feel like you’re chatting with an old friend about all things pregnancy. And from what I hear, this is something that sets this book apart from some of the older books out there.
The content is research based and supported by a team of five experts from various health/wellness fields.
The book is broken down by trimester (makes total sense), and at the end of each section, Jillian provides a customized workout plan. I intended to try her workouts, but then found some great YouTube channels and kind of forgot about this part of the book. But after taking a deeper look at what Jillian proposes, I can definitely see her plan being effective.
She includes a chapter on the “Fourth Trimester,” which I love since not too many people talk about it. From what I understand, there’s a [huge] adjustment period after the baby comes, and I feel like the information she shares is practical and well-founded.
Each chapter/section goes into a lot of depth without being too technical or even scary. The information is easy to understand, current, and fun to read. And everything is focused on baby and mommy’s health…no hidden agenda.

What I didn’t love about Yeah Baby!:

While everything Jillian shares makes sense, I often felt like I wasn’t being a good mommy-to-be because of her super high standards. For example, my make-up products aren’t all chemical free. But I’m trying my best. Is that good enough? I sure hope so!
To implement every single one of her suggestions, you need a lot of money. Period. It’s not easy for the average, every day women to buy all organic everything. That’s the honest truth. I truly believe we all try our best, but even then, some things are out of reach.
Again, the meal plan at the end of the book is not for the every day woman. So many strange ingredients. And this coming from someone who buys said strange ingredients regularly.

Overall, I found this book to be comprehensive and the perfect one stop shop for all of my pregnancy related questions/issues. Of course, I always check everything with my doctor, but it’s been nice to have a reference guide at home that’s written for the modern momma.

Apartment Drama + 25 Week Update

written by Parita 4 Comments

Sooo…we’re moving…yet again! The apartment drama I alluded to earlier? That was it.

BUT, things turned out a-ok because we’re staying in the same building on the same floor AND getting a slightly bigger place with more closet space. The best kind of move if you ask me.

The only down side to all of this is that I’ll be more pregnant than ever. Thank goodness for good friends and [potentially even] Task Rabbit.

I won’t get into the details as to why we have to move, but let’s just say it was a rough couple of weeks because we thought we were signing a three year lease on our current place. Also, we have a pretty big life change coming up in a few short months. Thankfully, it had nothing to do with us. In fact, our current landlord actually helped us find this new place.

BIG LESSON LEARNED: Staying as positive as possible really is the best way to face tough situations. As I said to Vishnu quite a few times, “What’s the alternative?”

All’s well that ends well I suppose!

25 Week Update (fair warning…random thoughts ahead)

Whenever someone asks me how I’m feeling, my response is almost always the same. “The baby is great. I’m feeling great…just getting bigger!”

The one word I like to use to describe this stage of the pregnancy is big. Vishnu says I feel bigger than I look, but that’s just it. I absolutely love my round pregnant belly…I just feel big. I feel big when I roll out of bed or switch sides while sleeping. I feel big when I have to squat down and pick something up. I feel big when I have to put my shoes on. I feel big after climbing the stairs at the train station. Honestly, it has nothing to do with my actual size. It’s just that my new size takes some getting used to, especially when it comes to daily life!

Other than the big factor, I randomly find myself lost in a sea of thoughts. None of which have to do with the baby himself. More so the logistics of having a baby. It’s weird because I’ve never once been worried or anxious about actually having a baby and all the changes that come with that. My thoughts tend to gravitate to things like how am I going to juggle being a full-time mommy with a full-time career while being married to a very much full-time resident physician. Or how am I going to get food on the table every night. Or will I be able to make time for exercise at some point. Or how is it going to work when Vishnu’s on nights.

Look, I obviously know it’s all going to work out. Millions and millions of people make it work every single day, and I have no doubt that we’ll figure out our own rhythm and all that jazz. It’s just funny to me that I’m thinking about the logistical elements right now versus thinking about keeping our little human alive. The latter part is something I’m excited about. I’m lucky to have 16 weeks at home with our little guy, and I can’t wait to get to know him. By no means am I saying those 16 weeks are going to be easy, especially the first few, but that’s not something I dwell on. Every new mom (and mom in general) goes through the hard stuff. It’s the juggling piece that makes me scratch my head. But like I said, Vishnu and I are a strong (and fun, if I do say so myself!) team, and I know we’ll be just fine.

Other thoughts that come and go…

We’re only going to be a little family of two for a few months now. I selfishly want all the Vishnu time I can get!
This pregnancy is flying by. The other day my sister mentioned how I only have 3/8 of the way to go, and it really stopped me in my tracks. How is that possible?
Who is our baby going to look like? I hope he’s a mix of both of us!
I wonder what the people at the gym think when I walk in and hoist myself up on the EFX machine. I’m hoping it’s “what a badass!”
I CAN’T WAIT TO HOLD OUR BABY!!!

Well, that’s week 25. So far so good!

Happy Friday, all! Make it a great one.

A Typical Week of Second Trimester Workouts

written by Parita Leave a Comment

I recently shared my favorite prenatal fitness resources, but I didn’t really talk about what a week of workouts looks like for me. Prenatal fitness is honestly so interesting because it’s 100% dependent on the woman and her individual pregnancy. What I share may be way too easy for some and a bit too much for others.

My biggest takeaway in my journey so far is to do what feels right to you. If you need to slow down, slow down. If you need to take a rest day, take a rest day. If yoga and walking feel good to you, do that. Don’t force fitness when you’re pregnant. Instead, choose to stay active as much as possible and know that every little bit counts. That’s my motto anyways.

Also, something obvious I should have expected is that as my body grows and changes so will my workouts. I don’t know why I thought first trimester Par would be the same as second trimester Par. Second trimester Par is definitely a lot slower, more tired, and easily exhausted. And this is noticeably apparent during my workouts. But every little bit counts, right?

Pretty much sums it up!

As far as my weekly workouts are concerned, I’m doing most of the same things I did in my first trimester and early in my second. The only difference, like I said, is that I have to be more cognizant of my pacing and the duration of my workouts.

So the following 24 week snapshot is a typical workout schedule for me right now, as it’s both doable and challenging. My biggest note here (and always) is to consult with your doctor prior to starting any fitness routine or changing your routine dramatically. Also, ALWAYS listen to your body and stop when something feels off, and don’t forget to drink lots and lots of water – before, during, and after all workouts.

A Typical Week of Second Trimester Workouts

Sunday – 30 minutes of intervals on the EFX machine + a prenatal strength workout + stretching

Monday – 30 minute brisk treadmill walk with 1, 2, and 3 level inclines + stretching + extra movement throughout the day (intentional as I worked from home)

Tuesday – 20 minute prenatal cardio workout + 20 minute prenatal cardio kickboxing workout

Wednesday – Rest day (aka wash my hair day)! I find that it’s hard for me to fit in a morning workout along with washing/styling my hair. Therefore, I strategically pick my rest days to coincide with hair washes. Win, win!

Thursday – 30 minute prenatal strength workout + stretching

Friday – 40 minutes of intervals on the EFX machine + stretching

Saturday – 30 minute steady state treadmill walk + 15 minute prenatal core workout + stretching

There you have it…a typical week of second trimester workouts. Crossing my fingers and toes that the same fitness gods allow me to carry on with similar workouts in my third trimester! Only 3 weeks away…ahhhh!

Our Indian Baby Shower!

Advice for New Moms-to-Be — Part One

Warning: Pregnancy Brain is Contagious

Pregnancy Transition – From the Second to the Third Trimester

A Review of Yeah Baby! by Jillian Michaels

Apartment Drama + 25 Week Update

A Typical Week of Second Trimester Workouts

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