My Inner Shakti

finding strength in everyday things

2021 Reflections

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I know I haven’t been sharing here much these past couple of weeks, but I’m changing things up today given we’re at the tail end of 2021 and sharing some of my key reflections (borrowing this idea from Brittany of A Healthy Slice of Life!). This isn’t a ‘look at all that I’ve accomplished’ list but more of a here’s what went down, what went well, and what could’ve been better.


Let’s jump right into it…

What was it like in the beginning?

To be completely honest, I started 2021 with a lack of clarity about whether or not I wanted to try for another child. I had an a-ha moment in my iPEC module in mid-January that led me to the conclusion that I did in fact want to try. By the end of the month, we were pregnant (very very fortunate).

I also had lots of hopes about Covid being a non-threat this year since the vaccine was starting to be rolled out.

And finally, lots of stressors about our move – would we find a place to live that we liked, how Kaiden would adjust, etc.

What worked well and what didn’t?

For the majority of the year, I wasn’t a great delegator and felt like I had to take the world on my shoulders. Later on in the year, I learned that I didn’t need to do that and that no one expected me to either. That realization was everything, and now I’m learning how to be a better delegator. Makes me a better human.

Also, with Kaiden, both Vishnu and I are learning what works and what doesn’t. For example, we can’t spring anything on him. He’s unable to pivot and adjust so we have to prep him waaaay in advance. Timers work, as well as positive reinforcement. Threats, punishment, and coercion don’t work with him!

Therapy works for me. Just thinking I can think my way out of certain thoughts/emotions, doesn’t/didn’t work.

My blog and IG space being truly for my own fulfillment works for me. What doesn’t work is posting and sharing for others, to drive up #s and engagement, etc. Leaving all of that in 2021!

What were the most important conversations and connections?

All of my conversations with Vishnu about parenting, our move, our career choices, our marriage, etc. were important and critical and continue to be.

My sister and I have had some amazing conversations as well this year, and I truly cherish my relationship with her.

And finally, reconnecting with all of my close friends in Atlanta has been super important/special to me.

What was the best entertainment?

Kaiden. Haha! He’s grown so much this year, it’s incredible when I think about it. He talks a mile a minute and always has a story to tell or a question to ask. Definitely my favorite form of entertainment is hanging out with him!

Who mattered?

My family. My friends. My online community. ME!

I’ve found a different kind of voice through my writing this year, and I’m so thankful for that, as well as my IG space and this blog. This truly is an outlet for me, and I love the community that’s grown along with me. So very special.

What changed?

The better question is what hasn’t changed. HAHA!

Well, we have an additional member of our family. We moved back home to Atlanta. Vishnu has a new job, so our finances have changed (lol!). I spent the last 3ish months on maternity leave, which was an adjustment at first, but I love it.

In a sense, everything changed for me/us, and in some ways, it’s all the same. We’re still the same crazy people we were a year ago, just in a different place.

Where did you find happiness and fulfillment?

I truly find the most happiness spending quality time with people I love. There’s nothing better than creating memories and having fun while you’re at it.

I also find a ton of fulfillment in processing my thoughts and ideas through writing. And secondary to that, connecting with people via my writing.

What did you learn?

I’m a lot stronger, mentally, physically and emotionally, then I give myself credit for.

And also, fear isn’t going to change the outcome of a situation. In fact, it’s probably just going to make your journey a living hell. Grounded hope is what I’m taking with me into the new year.

What is actually ending?

Not sure…will need this think about this one some more!

What do you want more of?

Quality time with family and friends. Travel. Time to write and reflect. More real life fun moments -> less online sharing of said moments. Hope. Lightness. Rest. Play. Laughter. Kindness.

The list goes on…

I hope you find some time to reflect on this past year and what you want your 2022 to look and feel like!

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My 2020 Word – Intentional

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If you follow me on Instagram, you may have happened to catch that I shared my 2020 word of the year. At the time, it was surrender. After much thought, I came to the conclusion that surrender didn’t meet my goals for the year. For how I wanted to speak, act, think, relate, etc. But intentional, as broad of a word as it is, definitely does.

A little context

Let me back up a little. I love everything about the new year. The clean slate. The opportunity to set goals and hopefully achieve them over the next 12 months. January is also my birthday month so there’s that too!

With that being said, I found that the resolutions I made every year were really just micro goals. What I wanted was a guiding principle. Something I could remind myself with when I got off track or needed a little kick in the butt. That’s when I decided to declare a word of the year every January. That word would fit my goals and overall desire for the year. The one that comes to mind from previous years is patience. That should probably be my word every year. Haha!

Why intentional?

Ok, so why intentional? Well, I want to be more purposeful/purpose driven in 2020. Whether it’s about what I’m eating, how I’m working out, how much time I’m spending on my phone, and most important, how I’m spending my time with Vishnu and Kaiden. I want the majority of my thoughts, words, and actions to be intentional and purposeful.

An example

I know it won’t be possible for every single thing I do, but 80% of the time, I want to have a clear intention behind why I’m choosing to do something or why I’m not choosing to do something. The best example of this comes with food. I often just eat because I like to or because something is available. Cookie? Sure. Cheese plate? Would love to? Wine? Duh. I know it sounds silly, but I’m not someone who gives a lot of thought to how much I’m eating or how mindfully I’m eating. And while it hasn’t caused any complications just yet, I did see how that mindlessness manifested itself over the past month or two. I want to have clear intentions for why I’m choosing to eat something, how much I’m choosing to eat, etc. I want to be a more intuitive eater, and I think having a very clear intention when it comes to food will help.

Like I said, the best and most clear cut example I have is in regards to food, but intentionality applies to everything.

I truly believe when it comes to our day-to-day life, we either run it or it runs us. And when you’re intentional about your thoughts, words, and actions, YOU are leading your life in the direction you want to take it and not vice versa.

One of the reasons I went with a Passion Planner this year is to help me stay intentional and plan my time out accordingly. It all makes sense now!

Tell me – do you do the whole resolution thing or do you opt for a word to help guide you? Please share regardless!

No portion of this post is sponsored.  However, affiliate links are included. There is no extra cost to you, but I do receive a small commission on anything you buy through my links.  Thank you for reading and supporting My Inner Shakti!

The Promise of a New Year

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HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I’m one of those walking cliches who loves the New Year. I’m all about January 1. If nothing else, it’s the promise it brings that excites me. January is also my birthday month, and there’s something about turning a year older at the start of the year that puts you in a ‘get my shit together’ mode!

If I’m being honest, I also love Mondays and the 1st of any month. The whole idea of a clean slate gets me every time!

I shared on Instagram a few posts back that my intention for 2019 is to take care of myself better, chose myself every day, and ultimately, ‘come home.’

In terms of the how, I plan to be better about managing my time so I have more time for me – to read, to write, to cook more complicated meals, to connect with Vishnu and friends/family, etc. I’ve lacked focus in the last year or so, and I plan to work on that so I can do the things that bring me joy. I’ll share more as I refocus (lol!) myself.

In terms of goals (because, yes, I set those too!), I have a few that I want to work on throughout the year (see below). These are more so focused on daily habits and intentions. And then for bigger projects, I’m setting monthly goals. For example, in January, I’d like to tackle our file folder box thingy. It’s overflowing and filled with very old files and paperwork. Need to get that thing in order!

Ok, so as far as my daily goals/habits are concerned, here they are…

  1. Drink ~80 oz of water every day.
  2. No technology 30 minutes before bed and within 30 minutes of waking.
  3. Go to bed by 10 pm every night and wake up before Kaiden (weekends are the exception).
  4. Decrease sugar and dairy consumption (consider ‘worth it’ moments). More to come on this one very soon!
  5. Speak and think as positively as possible. Good things are happening (even when you can’t ‘see’ them) and challenges are temporary. Look for the silver lining.

I think all of these are pretty doable. I’ll share more throughout the year on my progress.

And finally, I have a few goals in terms of this blog and my MIS Instagram page. Honestly, the biggest thing I want to accomplish is sharing other people’s stories. I’m one person with a limited view, and there are so many other inspiring and amazing people out there with meaningful life stories. And I want to share those! Be on the lookout.

Other than that, I plan to continue to share with as much authenticity as possible. I love following and connecting with others who are raw and open, so in 2019, I want to bring more of that to my platforms. Life’s too short to only share the pretty slices of pie!

From the very bottom of my heart, thank you for reading and following MIS! Let’s make 2019 a great year!

and so the adventure begins

2018 Mantra + Intentions

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Hello and happy 2018!  I can hardly believe the new year is upon us…but it is, and here we are!

Personally, I’m excited about this year and hopeful it will bring lots of adventure, growth, and joy into our lives (and the lives of others).  And if the past couple of days are any indication, it’s going to be a chaotic one.  For one, Kaiden starts daycare on Monday, so that in and of itself should be fun and…interesting!  Hoping he transitions well.  Aside from the day to day, we also have some fun travel plans on the horizon.  2018 is gearing up to be busy!

and so the adventure begins

2018 mantra

Speaking of chaotic, my 2018 mantra is to embrace the chaos.  This is what I plan to repeat to myself throughout the year when things get cray (good and bad).

I chose this mantra because despite my best efforts I’ve never been great at letting go of things out of my control and really staying present when life doesn’t go my way.  Instead, I tend to revert to stress and anxiety and snappiness.  No bueno!

Also, as a new mom, I really want to enjoy ALL aspects of motherhood because none of it lasts forever.  And despite how trying some parts of this journey are I want to embrace every single bit of it.  Of course, the good stuff is easy to enjoy.  The not so good…not so much!  I’m hoping this mantra will help make it somewhat easier.

So in 2018, I’m going to embrace the chaos when it comes to motherhood, work, and life in general.

2018 intentions

This year, instead of setting resolutions, I’m setting intentions.  For me the difference lies in how limiting resolutions are.  There’s no flexibility in how you apply your resolution.  You either do it or you don’t.  Intentions are a bit deeper and much more powerful.  They speak to a way of being.  I like that!

  1. Self-care – I intend to take better care of myself this year.  And I’m not talking about food and exercise.  For the most part, I think I have that part under control.  I’m talking about a deeper level of self-care.  I want to work harder on managing my stress levels and allowing others to help me as and when needed.  I’m not the best at asking for and accepting help, but I (and Vishnu) think it would help me manage my mental load a lot better.
  2. Use of time – I plan to be more intentional with how I use my time in 2018.  In the past 6 months, I haven’t been the best about using my time in a productive way that serves both what needs to happen and what I want to do.  For example, I haven’t read (and finished) a book in what feels like forever.  Not ok!  This intention should help reduce the stupid amount of time I spend on Instagram as well.  🙂
  3. Prayer and meditation – I’m a huge believer in the power of prayer.  And while I’m always taking a minute or two to pray throughout the day (mostly for what I’m grateful for), I want to create a more intentional prayer and meditation practice.  I’ve been trying unsuccessfully for years to meditate, but seeing how my focus this year is to embrace the chaos and take better care of myself, I’m going to make it happen!

I plan to check in about my mantra and intentions in a couple of months.  Wish me luck!

Your turn – Do you have a 2018 mantra? Did you set resolutions or intentions?  Tell me all about it.  I love this kind of stuff!

Gel manicure - Atlanta

End of 2016 + Hello 2017

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Happy New Year!  I hope you celebrated the end of one year and the beginning of the next with loved ones, good food, and lots of laughter.  We sure did!  More on that in a minute.

I was hoping to start the week with a new post, but luck would have it that the blog went down right after Christmas and didn’t go back up until yesterday.  I decided to switch hosts at the end of the year but didn’t take all the right steps to ensure a smooth transition (oops!).  All in all, it was a kind of expensive error that resulted in some downtime.  Lesson learned!

Anyways, before I delve head first into 2017, I want to reflect on the very end of 2016, specifically our trip to Hawaii and our time in Atlanta.  I’m going to start with Atlanta first because the Hawaii posts are going to take some time to write.  So much to share!

As I mentioned in my last post, I flew to Atlanta last Tuesday (Vishnu joined me on Thursday night) to spend some time with my parents.  Overall, we had so much fun cooking and eating delicious food (let’s be real – my mom did most of the cooking and I did most of the eating!), shopping, etc. Vishnu and I also got to spend some time with his brother and his parents which is always nice.  We spent NYE with Roshni/Samir, Naveen/Shaylee, and a few other new friends.  Honestly, it was the perfect way to ring in the new year – new to us restaurant with delicious food, great friends, LOTS of laughter…what more could one ask for!

I didn’t take too many pics for the blog, but here are a few to showcase all the fun…

Gel manicure - Atlanta

I started my trip with a stop at the nail salon where I got a MUCH needed pedicure and manicure.  No clue what the color on my hands is (I only know it by #44A), but the color on my toes is OPI ‘Liv” in the Gray.

Indian sweets for pooja

I helped my mom make a number of different Indian sweets for a pooja (religious ceremony) her and my dad hosted at the house on Friday.  The pooja was fantastic and very inspiring.  A great way to end the year!

New Years Eve at Cooks & Soliders

The 2016 NYE gang!

Yorkie

We also got to spend time with this cutie, my brother-in-law’s girlfriend’s dog!  I LOVE HER!

Green Enchiladas

My mom made a couple of trays of her famous green enchiladas while I was at home.  She also sent me home with tortillas, the sauces, and a recipe for the filling, all so I could recreate her masterpiece for my sister, BIL, and Vishnu.  And recreate I did!  SO DELICIOUS!

Vishnu and I arrived back in Chicago on the 1st.  And thankfully, we had a ‘free’ day since we didn’t start work until the 3rd.  We organized the apartment a bit, did laundry, went grocery shopping, etc. before the work week officially started.  I’m now convinced that we need to schedule in a buffer day after every vacation.  It helps SO much!

I’ve been reading so many posts and messages about people’s ambitious plans/goals for 2017.  It’s super inspiring on the one hand, however, for the first time in a long time, I’m taking the opposite approach.  I definitely have things I want to focus on this year, but instead of jumping into the deep end, I’m taking it ‘one day at a time.’  Anything, not everything is my 2017 mantra! We do have an entire year after all!  More on this in upcoming posts.

Well, with that, I hope your year is off to an awesome start!

2016 is the year of the pause

2016: The Year of the Pause

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My word of choice in 2015 was calm.  And I’d say I did a fairly decent job of keeping calm last year, although there were a few bumps along the way.  Even though I can’t say that I’ve mastered being a “calm in all situations” kind of person, I was able to focus because that was my word.  I’m light years from where I want to be, but I’m definitely moving in the right direction.

With that being said, instead of going down the resolution route (I prefer monthly goals instead), I’m sticking to making a word my word in 2016.

And that word is pause.

2016 is the year of the pause

I know, I know.  Pause isn’t the most glamorous or inspiring word.  In fact, it sounds super boring.  But just hear me out.

As my longtime readers know, I’m not a “wait and see” person or a “let me think about this for a 1,000 years before taking action” kind of person.  I’m a doer.  If there’s something that needs to get done, you better believe it will.  When decisions aren’t being made and things aren’t moving and shaking, I literally feel like screaming and pulling my hair out.

Now there are definitely some big upsides to this semi-crazy personality trait of mine.  I’ve been told that I’m responsible, proactive, results oriented, etc.  Great stuff…

…but there are lots of downsides as well.  For example, I get so focused on setting things in action that I often don’t think about my behavior.  I can seem really bossy.  My field of vision narrows and it’s hard for me to consider other people’s points of view.  You get it.

Over the last two weeks of December, I realized that in my normal day-to-day life something was missing.  I couldn’t put my finger on it though.  Then as we were going to bed one night, it hit me.  I rarely ever pause.  I jump from one thing to another without stopping (and oftentimes really thinking about what it is that I’m doing).

That is why 2016 is the year of the pause.  And not just when I’m interacting with other people…the pause applies to all areas of my life.

I’m sure this whole concept will evolve, but here’s where I hope to see lots of improvement…

Pause before hitting the snooze button on the alarm clock. 

Pause before checking my email first thing in the morning (and ultimately putting my phone down).

Pause when I’m saying bye to Vishnu in the morning and savor the moment instead of just saying “loveyoubye.”

Pause between each bite of food and before filling my plate with seconds.

Pause before picking up my phone to check social media for the 100th time (and ultimately putting my phone down).

Pause before sharing my opinion and ask “is what I’m about to say going to add value?”

And most importantly, pause (for as long as I need) before reacting to a person or a situation. 

The last one is a priority and a challenge (as in it’s hard) for me.  Not sure if you guys recall, but I started a Reaction Challenge a while back.  The first few weeks were great, and I felt like I was making progress.  And then somewhere along the way I reverted back to my old self.  Well, what I realized was that it’s great to want to change how you react to the not so good stuff, but it only works when you put in mechanisms to help you.  And for me in this moment, the pause is it.

I plan to blog a lot more about this over the next few months because from what I can tell this is something a lot of people have trouble with.  It’s not easy to open up about the less than perfect sides of ourselves, but it’s necessary.  And personally, I want to be more honest with all of you because life isn’t always rainbows and unicorns.  So expect more honest and raw posts from me about this topic in particular.

Now let me pause before saying…

…I hope your 2016 is off to a fabulous start!  Can’t wait to share more and connect with all of you this year!

Did you make a New Year’s resolution?  Or are you going the word of the year route? 

Dear 2012

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2012,

I wasn’t expecting you to come so quickly, but now that you’re almost here, I’m excited to greet you with open arms!

2011 was a wonderful year, but I have a feeling you’re going to be even better.  I’m so excited to see what you have in store for me. 

In all honesty, I’ve been thinking a lot about your arrival.  With others in the past, I really tried to think through what I wanted to accomplish.  I would even write down my goals with a sense of excitement.  However, after about a month or so, that list of goals would end up in the bottom of some drawer or basket in my house.  Don’t worry though – it’s going to be different with us!  I promise.

For one thing, I have a blog now.  This means that when I make public declarations, I do my best to stick them.  I think it’s called blogger responsibility or something like that.  Another huge thing that’s really going to help our relationship is my upcoming wedding.  This means that we’re going to have to work harder then ever the first six months of the year…I hope you’re up to that!  And don’t worry, I won’t leave you hanging the last half of the year.  No one can keep us apart, not even Vishnu!

So with all that, 2012, I present to you our detailed daily plan of attack.

FOOD
– Drink at least 48 ounces of water every day.  No excuses.
– Eat at least 3 servings of both fruits and vegetables every day.  And remember, variety is key.
– Incorporate protein into every single meal and snack.  Again, variety is the spice of life.
– Try to make one new-to-me meal a week (this will help a lot after the wedding).

EXERCISE
– Go to at least two spin classes a week.
– Continue running two times a week
– Strength train 2-3 times a week (DVDs, classes at the gym, etc.)

MISC.
– Take 15-20 minutes every night to prepare for the next day – make lunch, prep breakfast if needed, iron clothes, etc.
– Turn off the TV and laptop by 9:15 pm every night and read for at least 15 minutes before bed.
– Try to blog at least 4 times a week, as it’s a creative outlet and stress reliever.
– Make a conscious effort to eat slower (keep the Slow Down Challenge in mind).

I think this list covers all the major things I want to focus on daily.  I know you span an entire 365 days, but I am a big believer at taking things a day at a time.  I know I’m a little ambitious and sometimes even a little stubborn, but I think we’ll get along just fine! 

See you VERY soon!!
Parita


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