I can’t wrap my head around the fact that Kaiden’s 9 months old – the same amount of time he was in my belly!  Woah!  As excited as I am to see our baby grow and show us who he is, I desperately want time to slow down.  I mean, how is it already almost April 2018?!

Anyways, enough chit chat.  Let’s take a deeper dive into month 9.

STATE OF KAIDEN

First and foremost, Kaiden’s short vacay in Atlanta with his grandparents was a huge success.  From what I heard and all the pictures/videos I saw, he truly had the time of his life.  After we got back from Costa Rica, my mom shared that day one was a bit of mess and full of tears, but after that, he was living the good life.

Speaking of grandparents, month 9 also brought with it tons of boding time with his amama (paternal grandmother).  My MIL stayed with us for three weeks, which was a huge blessing in so many ways.  Especially because Kaiden got hand, foot, mouth disease.  But I’ve talked about that enough on here!

Another huge win this month included Kaiden finally starting to sleep through the night.  All it took was one night of crying it out (CIO).  I know the CIO method is controversial, but goodness it worked for us, and thankfully, it didn’t take days or even weeks to ‘train’ him.  [KNOCKING ON ALL THE WOOD!]  As of right now, K goes down around 6:15p, falls asleep on his own by 6:45p at the latest, and wakes up at 5a for his first feeding.  Vishnu and I are currently trying to figure out how to push the 5a wake up call to the 6 o’clock hour.  Don’t get me wrong.  We know how lucky we are to get a full night of sleep (finally), but with both of us working and trying to get out the door by 7a, it would be nice if K woke up a little later.  Even if it doesn’t happen, I’ll take this new situation any day!

In terms of food, Kaiden is now eating chunkier meals, as I want to transition him to table foods soonish.  I’ve noticed a little more interest on his part this week in grabbing food and putting it in his mouth.  It’s a VERY messy but fun process!  We’ll see how it goes.

K’s also on the verge of crawling.  He’s scooting for sure, and rocks back and forth on all fours all the time, but it may take a few more weeks for him to put everything together.  But once he does, Vishnu and I are in for the time of our lives I’m sure!  K also regularly tries to pull himself to standing.  It’s to the point where if you try to position him a different way, he’ll fight it by stiffening his little legs.  So cute!

My favorite new development which is also the most frustrating at times is how active Kaiden is when we’re getting him ready for bed (post-bath time).  He literally wrestles with us and won’t stay still – twisting, turning, flipping over, getting on all fours…and then eventually whining when we get him back in position and continue with the process.  It cracks me up!

This month also brought out more of K’s personality.  If I had to pick one word to describe him at this age, it would be curious.  Boy loves to be in the know with everything.  You can’t get anything past him.  Once he sees/hears something, he has to know more.  He definitely gets this from Vishnu, and I’m so glad because it’s one of the things I love most about V.

While month 9 was pretty great (aside from the HFM), it’s not all rainbows and unicorns.  One example of this would be Kaiden’s need for company at all times.  He does not like to be left alone and has no problem letting you know.  I don’t think its separation anxiety because he’s fine when we leave him with other people.  I honestly think he just hates being alone, which obviously creates some interesting situations, especially when one of us is home alone with him.  But we’re working on it.

Overall, this is such a fun age!  So much yelling, babbling/talking, giggling, smiling, and JOY!  I can’t imagine it getting any better than this.

STATE OF MAMA

Overall, I’m feeling pretty good.  This month was certainly stressful at times, but having my MIL stay with us taught me it’s ok to ask for help.  This doesn’t mean you’re any less of a mom.  In fact, I felt like the best mom over the past few weeks.  This mayyyy have something to do with getting more sleep…just a thought!

I’m also happy to report that I survived leaving K with my parents for six nights.  There was a little bit of sobbing at first on my part (in the middle of the airport no less), and it was weird to have some much independence for so long, but looking back, I can honestly say going to Costa Rica was good for all three of us.

Other than that, I’m really looking forward to spring – better weather, visits to the park, exploring different parts of Chicago, etc.

STATE OF DADDY

This past month was full of weird work shifts for Vishnu.  He covered for a few different people, which meant things were constantly changing for us.  And the next two months are also pretty intense.  He has three tough back-to-back rotations.  When I think about this and get ahead of myself, I feel super overwhelmed.  That’s when my mama motto comes into play – one day at a time.

Vishnu also faced his own sickness this month – strep.  Ugh!  Although, the other day he mentioned how it could’ve been a version of K’s HFM.  We’ll never know, I suppose.

And you guys, you should’ve seen V in Costa Rica!  He had the time of his life.  This alone made my heart smile.  I’m pretty sure we need an annual family vacay (I want to bring K with us next time) during the winter to a warmer place.  It’s good for the soul!

Other than that, Vishnu is looking forward to life as a family of three again!

STATE OF VISHNU AND PAR

You guys, I went ahead and started Dark Places without Vishnu!  I’m hoping he catches up soon because I’m not letting myself read more until he does.  I wouldn’t say it’s Gone Girl good, but it’s pretty decent so far.  More to come…when we get through the whole thing…together.

Costa Rica was good for Vishnu and Par.  We needed a vacation, and it was starting to show.  Now we’re working on scheduling other activities and planning things out in advance.

Putting aside our bucket list, our real goal is to stay as connected as possible.  And more than anything that means really listening, talking, and making quality time for each other.

And that’s month 9 in under 1200 words!  On to the double digit months…ahhh…and all the fun to come!

I’m going to make a bold statement.  Despite being a super fun age, month 8 did not fly by.  Not at all.

Obviously, I don’t mean this in a negative way, but the days certainly felt long.  I’m 99% positive this has to do with the gloomy weather and Kaiden having an intense cold since mid-January.  No bueno.

We have had some fun sprinkled throughout though – Valentine’s Day party at K’s school, a fun and unexpected night in with my sister, a great movie, and pizza, music class and a lunch date with a friend, etc.

With that, let’s see how each member of our household fared in month 8.

STATE OF KAIDEN

Despite having an epic cold, Kaiden remained our happy-go-lucky little baby.  I really hope this is signs of things to come!  The only time it truly impacted him from what we could see is at night.  The congestion really got the best of him (and us).

When I really think about it, the things that stand out to me this month are more so related to his personality.  For example, when he gets upset, it literally takes him five seconds to calm down and go back to jumping and smiling.  I think I need to take a page out his book!  He’s also the happiest in the morning (maybe all babies are?), and a tiny bit grouchier in the evenings.  I have no idea where he gets it from!  From what we can tell, Kaiden is also stubborn.  If he doesn’t want to do something, there is no way you’ll get him to do it.  Eating, smiling, talking – it’s all done on his terms.

Another fun recent development involves Kaiden randomly shaking his head no.  It’s the cutest thing ever.  I now have him shaking his head yes too.  And he does it on cue when we say ‘yes, yes, yes, yes, yes’ or ‘no, no, no, no, no.’  But again, only when he really wants to!

As far as food goes, Kaiden is drinking his normal amount of milk plus 3 meals a day.  We’re no where close to eating finger food, but we did graduate to thicker/chunkier purees.

Sleep, as I mentioned, is still a big miss.  It all starts out well, and then goes to hell around midnight and then again at 4 am.  Vishnu and I are waiting this cold out before taking any action.

In terms of physical developments, we are trying to encourage crawling as much as possible.  Spoiler alert – he’s no where close!  Lots of people have told us K will likely walk before he crawls.  We shall see!  And while he’s not eating finger foods yet (literally the only thing he won’t put in his mouth), he does have a better handle on the pincer grab.  Enough to help him throw his food on the floor.  Ha!  And one last thing – Kaiden started clapping all on his own this month!  You would’ve thought he found a solution to world peace with the way we reacted!  Ha!

And finally, daycare!  It’s still going well.  Honestly, the only downside we see is the sickness (and the cost!).  But from what we hear, it’s either now or later.  Kaiden still loves his teachers (and vice versa!)…so much so that he still doesn’t look back twice when I leave.  But thankfully, he greets us with an eager smile at the end of the day!

And that, in a nutshell, is my Mr. K!  On to month 9…

STATE OF MAMA

Just when I think I have a handle on life, something comes up and throws me off.  I really wish I wasn’t someone who thrives on routine and schedules, but I am, and I can’t help feeling overwhelmed when my routine gets thrown out the window.  It’s been 8 months, yet I’m still not as agile as I need to be.  Maybe one day!  For me, when things go crazy, and I need to dig deep and embrace the chaos, I also need to learn how to manage my energy more effectively.  I tend to be a go big or go home type of person, so I want to go my all to everything and everyone.  Basically, that’s a recipe for disaster, and I, in turn, am a hot mess!  Once I figure out this whole energy management thing, I’ll be sure to share my thoughts.  I feel like it’s a helpful topic for everyone, mama or not.

Something else I’m dealing with is a new kind of guilt.  The guilt that creeps up when you feel anxiety or sadness or anger because you know you still have it better than so many people.  The guilt that screams, “Who are you to complain?”  No solutions yet, except giving myself some grace and constantly saying thanks for all that I have and sending love to those who need it.

Other than that, I’m just trying to figure out the whole working mama thing.  Some days are great and I feel like superwoman, and some days are a mess where I feel like I can’t get it together.  That’s when I have to remind myself…one day at a time!

STATE OF DADDY

Vishnu is doing well.  I think the sleep deprivation hit him harder than it has in the past.  But of what he has going on the next day, he will jump up to get Kaiden or comfort him.  He really is our superman!

Vishnu and K’s bond really grew this past month.  You should see how Kaiden’s face lights up when he sees his daddy!  Dare I say it’s more so than when he sees mama.  Vishnu’s also having a lot of fun interacting with K now that he follows cues and is physically stronger.  I can see these two rough- housing in the future!

STATE OF PAR AND VISHNU

One of the biggest highlights of the month is the fact that we finally got our act together and created an P+V bucket list.  And we kind of sort of started one of our 10 things already – our book club for 2. Well, we picked out and ordered our book. Step 1 – check!

We did have one fail this month. Instead of a delicious date night at a new-to-us restaurant, we ended up cancelling because Kaiden vomited a few times as we were getting ready. My sister was over and ready to take over and everything! It still ended up being a fun night – like I said before, we watched a fun movie and enjoyed pizza and ice cream! We’ll try again soon.

Overall, something I’ve really noticed and appreciated is that we make a real effort to connect every day. We talk about our days, laugh about things Kaiden did, and try to spend quality time with each other technology free. Not that we didn’t connect before, but now it feel so much more intentional. It’s made all the difference – less annoyances and more fun, more getting stuff done, more like the good old days. Again, it’s not perfect, but it’s us!

And finally, we have a fun trip in the works for the end of March. We’re headed to Costa Rica with my sister, Adarsh (her husband) and Niel (Vishnu’s brother). No Kaiden though. He’ll stay with my parents in Atlanta while we’re away. Vishnu (and everyone else) sold me on this trip by reiterating how it would be good for our sanity and a much needed vacation. It took me a while to come around and agree to leave K behind, but I think it’ll be good for all of us. More to come soon!

And with that, we say good-bye to month 8 and hello to month 9!