You wouldn’t necessarily know it from reading my blog, but lately I’ve felt like my stomach is constantly in one big knot. In other words, I’ve been a little stressed. It’s not a bad thing (don’t worry, mom), as I truly believe the little everyday stresses are what keep us moving forward.
I’ve been thinking a lot about the things that are constantly on my mind, and I know no one is going to believe me, but the wedding isn’t one of them. In fact, I can’t wait until the wedding because I know it’s going to be a ton of fun. The things that do weigh heavy right now are finding an apartment that both Vishnu and I like, finding a job in my new city, and being a good wife.
Let me explain…
As far as the apartment is concerned, I did the research and compiled a list of 10 places for us to check out this weekend. However, without knowing where I’m going to be working, we’re basically just going with a central location. And to top it all off, none of the places on my list wowed me. I know I sound like a brat when I say this, but I want our first apartment together to be nice and a place we both want to come home to. We’ll see. I’m 99% sure there’s nothing to worry about, but this has been on my mind for a while now so I thought I’d share.
The next thing that keeps me up at night is the good ole J-O-B. With Vishnu being in school for the next three years, I’m going to be bringing in the $$$. Currently, I have two potential opportunities in the works, but I won’t know anything concrete for another few weeks. Everyone keeps telling me to take time off after the wedding and not rush the whole work thing, even if it’s just a month. But I don’t want to. What would I do all day? Anyway, with all the effort I’ve been putting in and plan on putting in over the next couple of months, something should materialize (*fingers crossed*).
And finally, the whole wife thing. I don’t know brought this on, but I’m afraid I won’t be a good wife. Now, if one of my friends came to me with this thought, I know I’d be able to talk them out of it by sharing that no one is perfect, every relationship is different, and that there is no right or wrong way of being a wife. However, when I try to tell myself those things, I get more stressed out. This one really baffles me because Vishnu and I have been dating for so long, and I truly believe I’ve been a great girlfriend. If I had to guess, I think I’m more nervous about being responsible for someone other than myself and not being good at that. I’ve shared this with Vishnu, and of course he thinks I’m being ridiculous, but I can’t help it. I know, I know…one day at a time – that’s all anyone can do, right!?
Phew…I really needed to get those thoughts off my chest. I feel a little better already.
Like I said earlier, stress doesn’t necessarily have to be a negative thing as long as it’s handled properly. By talking to Vishnu, friends, and family, I’m usually able to stay calm and focused. Working out regularly and eating nutritious, healthy foods does wonders too. Otherwise I’d look like this all the time…
What’s something that has been stressing you out lately? Get it off your chest…I promise you’ll feel better!