Relationships Archives - My Inner Shakti

What Will Be Bill Gates’ Legacy?

Bill and Melinda Gates recently announced that they were getting divorced. I must admit I was a little shocked when I saw that headline. Of course, I have no insight into what happens behind the scenes of anyone’s marriage, but I just figured they were all good since they’re such do gooders! Wrong assumption to make, I guess.

Anyways, when I first read the headline, I didn’t think twice about it. Then I read a follow-up article that said Bill goes on annual intellectual retreats with his ex-girlfriend. I told Vishnu about that, and we both agreed it sounded fishy. But if he’d been doing it for years, why get divorced now?

The the articles about asking women out to dinner and Bill’s friendship with Jeffrey Epstein came out, and everything made more sense. It seemed that this has all been brewing since 2019.

In the grand scheme of things, this is really no one’s business but there’s IMO, however, it all does make you stop and pause…

What is Bill Gates’ legacy going to be?

Will he be remembered as the man who gave millions and millions to people around the world who needed it the most (and saved lives while he was at it)? Will he be remembered as an innovative genius who revolutionized the way we use technology? Will he be remembered for his foundation?

Or will he be remembered for the recent turn of events?

Vishnu definitely believes it’s the former and passionately believes it should be that way. If I’m being honest, I’m a little torn. While I do think he’s singlehandedly done so much amazing work, recent news points to his very human flaws. I think I just feel like he’s not as moral and straightforward as he came across, and that’s just disappointing.

But that begs the point…no one…absolutely no one…is infallible.

P.S. I told Vishnu that if we one day learn Barack Obama did something shady to Michelle, I would go hide under a rock for two weeks. That would be some MAJOR disappointment right there!

P.P.S. I fully know and understand that there are waaaaay more important things happening in the world right now. This was just something Vishnu and I discussed at length the other night, so I wanted to share.

What do you think? What will and should Bill Gates’ legacy be?

A Winter Staycation in Chicago

written by Parita Leave a Comment

When I used to think about staycations, I’d think of staying in your own home and doing nothing. This never sounded fun to me because I’m someone who can always find something to do – dishes, laundry, organizing, etc. I can’t just sit in my own home and do nothing.

When my sister suggested Vishnu and I go on a short trip in February (she even sent me dates that her and my BIL could watch K), I hesitated at first because who wants to travel in February in the Midwest…? Not me!

But then Vishnu suggested we do a staycation in Chicago, but instead of staying home, we stay at a hotel in the city for a couple of nights. Now that was something I could get on board with.

I messaged my sister to double check that the weekend we were thinking would work for her and Adarsh, and then I told Vishnu to pick a hotel.

He choose the Langham Chicago. A little pricey (but still 1/2 the price of what it would be), but his logic (which I agreed with) was that if we were going on an actual vacation, we’d be paying a lot more. Given that we’re not going on an actual vacation for a while, this felt like the perfect little splurge.

So here’s the thing about doing a staycation during Covid…it’s super relaxing because you can’t do much anyways.

On Friday, we got to the hotel around 4 pm. We checked in and then literally watched TV and talked until it was time to figure out dinner. I have a ton of Lettuce Entertain You dollars, so we ordered in from RPM (also my fav restaurant in the city). We watched Crazy Rich Asians before passing out for the night.

Saturday morning started later than it ever has. I didn’t sleep well the night before, so I stayed in bed until 11 am! UNHEARD OF! We then ordered breakfast from Wildberry (Vishnu’s fav). Next up, a lonnnnng walk around the city. Thankfully, the weather was great, so we ended up covering close to 6 miles. We walked mostly along the lake, which was literally a white winter wonderland. We can home, legs aching, and opted to watch TV and chill. When hunger hit again, we ordered in from Small Cheval (I got a delish lettuce wrapped veggie burger!). We ended the night with the Netflix movie The White Tiger.

Sunday…time to go home. I woke up early, squeezed in a quick workout, and showered, while Vishnu ran and got us coffee. We then hung out for a bit in our room before picking up lunch for the gang back home.

In some ways, it feels like we literally did nothing. In my eyes, that was the best part. Vishnu and I haven’t had time like this together in a very long time (like so many couples), and we’re so lucky to have my sister and BIL closeby and the resources to do something like this.

If at all possible, I highly recommend it, even if for one night. Although, we did spend a lot of our time watching videos of Kaiden, and then FaceTiming with them back at home! Ha! That’s just how it goes I suppose.

As for K, he had a blast with his masa and masi. I was a little worried because when I talked to him about the weekend and what he could expect, he told me that he didn’t want them to come over and that he wanted to go with mama and dada. But of course, like with everything else, he had so much fun. In fact, he was super sad when Aekta and Adarsh left our place on Sunday. Breaking my heart all over the place!

Overall thoughts on the Langham – We said we give it a 4/5. It’s a beautiful hotel, in a great part of town, but I’m sure we could’ve found a comparable property for much less than what we even paid. I will say though, if you’re going to use all the facilities and eat at the restaurants, this could be a worthwhile investment.

The Story of Us – Year 13

written by Parita 8 Comments

I’ve shared a lot of stories on MIS over the years. Like A LOT! And most of them have involved Vishnu in some way, but the story I haven’t shared is the one about how we met and eventually started dating. Until now that is…

And the best part is today’s our 13 year dating anniversary!

Vishnu and I met for the first time in January 2005 during a ski trip organized by four of the major universities in Georgia (I went to the University of Georgia and he went to Georgia Tech). He even hung out in our hotel room for a bit, but I didn’t talk to him. Haha. The one thing I remember is that he was wearing a Batman t-shirt. Guess what? That shirt’s in my closet now!

Fast forward to February 4, 2005. The day we met (again) and actually talked to each other!

Vishnu came to Athens with our mutual friend Kartik for UGA’s annual Indian Cultural Exchange (ICE) formal. The backstory is that Vishnu was originally just my friend Monica’s date. I was supposed to go with my friend Atul, but he couldn’t make it because of an exam. To make a long story short, Vishnu ended up being both mine and Monica’s date.

On Friday night (the night before the formal), a bunch of us ended up hanging out at our apartment. Kartik and Vishnu stayed the night at our place. The next morning, Vishnu and I watched a Bollywood movie together (Aitraaz) because I wanted to and he was there. I always joke that Vishnu tricked me that morning because here I was, a Bollywood princess, thinking this cool guy from Tech was also into Bollywood. Turns out he was into Priyanka Chopra. Ha!

That night we all went to the formal and had a blast. Vishnu and I even slow danced together to a Bryan Adams song. It was more goofy than romantic but still a fun memory!

After the formal, a bunch of us went to iHop, and on the way back to our apartment, Vishnu casually asked for both mine and my roommate’s phone number. At this point, I didn’t think anything of it because we literally just met. He was obviously already in love with me!

Over the next few months, we met up when we could and talked on the phone A LOT. In fact, during one of those months, we blew through something like 6,000 minutes.

It wasn’t until summer break when I started my internship in Atlanta and Vishnu started summer classes in the city when we started hanging out more frequently and by ourselves. He was even my ‘date’ to my company’s annual summer event.

Sometime in June things started to change, and I started having feelings for Vishnu. I remember the exact moment I thought, “Hey, I really like this guy!” Before said movie started, I got up to go to the restroom, and as I was walking away, Vishnu said something funny. I laughed and realized that he was no longer just my friend Vishnu.

Of course, I kept that little tidbit of information to myself.

Then a few days before the 4th of July, we made plans to grab dinner and watch the fireworks together. Something felt different that night. Vishnu was much more touchy feely and playful. I thought it was a little weird but didn’t want to make any assumptions.

July 4, 2005!

After the fireworks, we decided to grab some dessert at Cafe Intermezzo (our fav place!). We somehow got into a discussion about how our friends thought we were dating because we hung out all the time, etc., etc. It basically ended with how we didn’t want to ruin our friendship…sooo no dating! Vishnu dropped me off at my car and that was that. Or so I thought.

On my way home, I was talking to my best friend Roshni about my ‘date’ and all the weirdness when I got a call from Vishnu. I said hi. He asked, “Soooo has dating crossed your mind?” I said, “Ummmm yes.” He said, “Ok, cool.” And that was that! With that question, we officially started dating and the rest is history!

Legally married!

The past 13 years have been full of ups, downs, long distance, business school, medical school, residency, new jobs, a trillion moves, a beautiful baby, etc. And you know what, while it’s been an amazing ride so far, I know the best is yet to come! Especially with my best friend and main man by my side! Happy 13, babe!

Your turn – How long have you and your significant other known each other?

A Pair of Onitsuka Tigers Made Me Cry

written by Parita 6 Comments

Let me start by saying that those who know me best will likely not be surprised by this story. It’s very Parita.

So Vishnu is a huge fan of the Asics Onitsuka Tiger line of shoes. He has at least five different pairs. If you’re not familiar with it, it’s a street sneak that comes in lots of different colors and style variations.

Up until this past year, I’ve never really been interested in owning a pair of Onitsuka Tigers. Vishnu even bought me a pair he found on sale, and while I loved his thoughtfulness, the style just wasn’t my favorite. They’re now my errand shoes. 🙂

With that being said, after searching high and low for my perfect casual sneaker, I found the PERFECT pair of Tigers. These bad boys checked every box. Neutral color scheme, not too bulky/wide, and decent price point.

You’d think I’d just hit the purchase button, but for some reason, I couldn’t. The thought of buying these shoes made me feel guilty. I have no explanation because I bought plenty of other things at higher price points so it wasn’t about the money.

Anyways, by the time I was ready to make these my own, every website was out of my size – Asics, Amazon, Zappos, you name it. Vishnu told me he would keep an eye out and hit that purchase button as soon as he could.

And then…we had a baby and life got busy. New shoes were no longer a priority.

Fast forward to Saturday afternoon. Vishnu, Kaiden, and I went to brunch, and on our way back, I took a little detour to Michigan Ave to run a few errands while the boys headed home. When I walked into the apartment, Vishnu asked me what size my first pair of Tigers are. I told him, and he responded by telling me to check and make sure. I opened our shoe closet, found the shoes, checked the size, and told him again. I could tell he was trying to get to something but couldn’t figure out what. When he realized I wasn’t getting it, he got up, walked over to me, reached into the closet, and pulled out a brand new pair of Tigers…the very ones I’d been eyeing for months!!!

What did I do?

Welllll…I burst into tears. You guys, I had HUGE tears running down my face for at least 3-5 minutes. It was a little ridiculous!

Vishnu, knowing full well this was a very Parita reaction, was still a bit surprised. So he did two very Vishnu like things. He hugged me and laughed. While I cried and asked why he’s so nice to me.

I chalk all of this up to Vishnu’s thoughtfulness and…the last bit of pregnancy hormones that have yet to leave my body. Ha!

But seriously, how cute is my hubby? And how dramatic am I?

Also, if you can find your size, get these shoes because they’re awesome. Also, we can be shoe twins! 🙂

5 Years of Love, Laughter, and Driving Each Other a Little Crazy

written by Parita 2 Comments

Today is mine and Vishnu’s wedding anniversary! 5 years of love, laughter, and driving each other a little crazy. And I wouldn’t change any of it for the world!

On our wedding day, I remember thinking, “This is the BEST day of my life. I’m marrying my best friend.” And while it was an amazing day and so special in so many ways, I now know how wrong I was. It wasn’t the best day of my life.

Every day since, no matter how hard or crazy, has been the best. Waking up next to him is the best. Eating with him is the best. Watching TV with him is the best. Running errands with him is the best. Cooking with him is the best. Yes, even arguing with him is…ok so not the best, but there’s no one else I’d rather bicker with! Basically, doing life with him is the BEST.

And soon enough navigating parenthood with him will be the best!

Love you, boo! Here’s to the past 5 years and the lifetime ahead of us!

The start of the rest of our lives!

Honeymooning!

Year 1 in the books!

Babymooning!

[Insert year 5 picture]

Year 5 in the books!

Why Do You Love Me?

written by Parita 2 Comments

As you guys know, I’m obsessed with This is Us. Tuesdays bring a sense of pure happiness (because I love the show so much) and a sense of dread (because I know the tears will be flowing). The past few weeks were no different, as I sobbed my way through most every episode. Such a human show!

The season finale aired this past week, and while it didn’t induce as many tears, the last five minutes were as equally heartbreaking as they were heartwarming. No worries, I’m not going to give anything away!

Two of the main characters get into a heated argument and one asks the other, “Why do you love me?” At first, there is no response, but then the next morning, this particular character blows us away, as he always does, with his answer. That’s when my tears start!

After the episode ended, I looked at Vishnu and asked, “Why do you love me?” Without an ounce of hesitation, he said, “I love you because you make me feel more like me than anyone I’ve ever known.”

[Cue more tears!]

My husband is the sweetest man ever (when he wants to be!), and with that answer, I’m pretty sure he could be on the This is Us writing staff!

Happy Friday, all! And when you say I love you to the special people in your life, be sure to tell them why. It’ll make their day!

Weekly Marriage Meeting

written by Parita Leave a Comment

I’d like to think that after over four years of marriage Vishnu and I are pretty good communicators and generally know what we each need to do to keep our household running. But then out of nowhere, a great idea presents itself.

When my sister and her husband came over for dinner the other night, they talked about their weekly marriage meeting. This is something they recently implemented to stay on the same page every week. With two incredibly demanding schedules, it’s easy to focus on work and put your marriage and essential tasks on the back burner. Especially as newlyweds.

What’s a weekly marriage meeting you ask? Well, it’s exactly what it sounds like. It’s a 30 ish minute weekly meeting where you come together as a couple and do some or all of the following…

Give a general update on your weekly happenings
Share something your partner did that you really appreciated
Review the previous week’s goals
Set a few key goals for the coming week
Discuss financials and anything related to your family budget
Meal plan together

Personally, this is right up my alley. I love setting (and achieving) goals, meal planning, etc.

Even if you’re nothing like me, hear me out. Relationships are hard work and require special attention. I think that’s something we can all agree on. I also think we can agree on the fact that it’s easy to take your significant other for granted every now and again. It’s not intentional of course, but when you see each other everyday, it’s easy to make everything but your love a priority. These meetings help avoid that!

If you’re still not convinced, how about this – your relationship is like your job. It requires you to set goals, check in regularly, acknowledge what’s working well, provide constructive feedback, etc. A good friend said this to me once, and it really stuck. I would never let my responsibilities at work to fall to the wayside, so why would I do that to my most precious relationship. Am I right or am I right?!

Anyways, now that you’re convinced that you and your significant other need to hold weekly meetings, here are a few ground rules to ensure your meetings are productive.

Schedule your meetings so that everything else revolves around them. And don’t cancel!
Put your phone and anything else that could prove to be a distraction away.
Sit together. Side-by-side. It’s more intimate!
Always keep an open mind and frame everything in a positive way. This is not the time to bring your grievances to the table. Schedule a separate meeting for that!

In all honestly, Vishnu and I did a lite version of this for a couple of weeks (and actually enjoyed it). We didn’t follow rule #1 so that’s probably why the concept didn’t stick. But with a new year upon us in a few short weeks, I’m ready to bring weekly marriage meetings back. Wish us luck!

Do you and your significant other do something similar? What are you tips and tricks for staying on the same page when life gets in the way?

What Will Be Bill Gates’ Legacy?

A Winter Staycation in Chicago

The Story of Us – Year 13

A Pair of Onitsuka Tigers Made Me Cry

5 Years of Love, Laughter, and Driving Each Other a Little Crazy

Why Do You Love Me?

Weekly Marriage Meeting

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