My Inner Shakti

finding strength in everyday things

#12 + #39 + 7 lessons

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This time of year is always very reflection heavy for me. And not so much because it’s the start of a new year.

January is special because it’s my birth month, and it’s My Inner Shakti’s birth month. And this year I turned 39 while MIS turned 12!

I can’t believe I’ve had this little corner of the internet for 12 years! What a ride it’s been.

I literally started on a whim after talking to a good friend about how I wanted to start a blog ‘one day.’ She was so supportive and told me I totally should. Later that night, I researched how to start a blog, and from there, MIS came to be via WordPress.com! One day was actually a few hours later, and I’m so thankful I took the leap to put myself out there! 12 years later here we are.

So much of my life is documented here – all of my moves, my wedding, friend’s weddings, birthdays, all the small stuff…

Speaking of birthdays, I just celebrated #39. And by celebrated, I mean I spent time with loved ones (over the course of the weekend), had a lovely lunch with one of my best friends, and spent the evening with Vishnu and the kids. Perfection in my mind!

In true Parita fashion, I thought I would share some of the big things I’ve taken away from both my 39 years and my 12 years as a blogger/storyteller. I think all of these apply to all different aspects of life and are truly the things I think about when I think about anything and everything I do.

  1. If you feel a pull towards something, get curious about it! Take the time to find out if it’s meant for you, and if the answer is a resounding yes, take action and go for it! Nothing bad ever comes from these kinds of ‘risks’ and leaps. No matter what happens, you learn. From the way I look at it, it’s a win win!
  2. Your presence and who you are supersedes what you do any day. People will forget the details of what you do, but they’ll never forget how they felt in your presence, and more importantly, how you made them feel.
  3. At the end of the day, the actions we do or do not take on things determine the direction our life takes. Sure, things will happen that are out of our control, but I’m a believer in the idea that we shape our lives by doing and trying. Thinking will only take you so far. Live your life like an experiment is what this essentially boils down to.
  4. Whenever possible, try to respond versus react (something I’m working very hard on at the moment!). There are very few things that call for a reaction. Personally, I try to create space between whatever’s happening and my response. That way I’m being conscious and thoughtful about shaping what happens next.
  5. Never forget the immense power that lies in ONE! We all want to change the world and reach more and more people, but there is so much power in reaching one person. It’s the knocking down of that one domino that creates beauty and progress. Personally, I aim to help/inspire/motivate one person every day, and sometimes that includes me!
  6. SHARE YOUR STORY! To the point above, you never know who you’re helping by sharing your story/perspective/etc. We are all living beautiful, textured, complex lives, and I truly believe we are better off by sharing the good, the not so good, and the neutral. My central premise of sharing has always been to make people feel less alone in whatever they’re going through. Even if you don’t want to share publicly on social media/blog, share with those you feel comfortable with and watch as those relationships flourish and continue to grow. There’s power in openness and vulnerability. We all have something to offer.
  7. Be kind. You’ll never regret it…

And finally, thanks for being here! I appreciate you more than you’ll ever know.

What’s Good?

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Y’all! It. Has. Been. A. Week!

HFM for one kid and the an intense stomach virus/bug for the other. With Vishnu out of town this weekend to top it off.

If I’m being completely honest, I definitely threw myself an elaborate pity party and stayed there for a while. It’s not the sicknesses that get to me. Those are a part of kids going to school…and being a parent. It’s the kids having to miss out on stuff because of the sicknesses, especially Kaiden. I feel bad that he hasn’t seen his friends in a while or that we have to keep bowing out of stuff because someone is not feeling good.

I told my friend Monica this the other day, and she acknowledged and validated my feelings, but then she also got real with me, which is something I love about her. She basically said that if it’s not us it’s someone else. These feelings are a part of the ride, and that we’re super lucky to have the group of friends we have…people we actually want (and want our kids) to spend time with.

Her words rang true on so many levels, so I grabbed my bag and ran out of my own party!

And then I started a ‘what’s good?’ list because I needed to refocus my mind on everything that went/is going well…because there’s definitely more good than not.

An intense Mila tantrum – not good but she gets over it quickly…so kind of good?!

So here are a few things I came up with…

  • Even though the HFM and stomach bug sucked big time, both are curable. Also, given the severity of each, both kids actually fared ok and were in decent spirits.
  • My parents are able to and want to help me when needed. Even though this wasn’t the weekend I had in mind, I’m so thankful they were around to help me. Definitely couldn’t have done it on my own.
  • Even though it feels like we’re always missing out, we have so many more opportunities coming up to hang out with our friends. We’re lucky to have the friends we have.
  • Despite the craziness that was Saturday, I got to celebrate a dear friend of mine and her engagement. Seeing how happy she was reminded me of what really matters in life.
  • Vishnu had a really good time in Vegas (well-deserved too), BUT NOW HE’S BACK!!! Phew!
  • Even though I had a few very minor stomach bug type symptoms, I was unaffected overall by the HFM (thank goodness). Vishnu also got some symptoms while on his trip, but they lasted less than 24 hour thankfully.
  • Mila loves her new classroom and teacher at school. She may be bringing home all the bugs but at least she’s happy!
  • Kaiden also still loves school, and told me the other day, “I don’t like Saturdays because there’s no school on Saturdays.” He’ll change his mind soon enough, but I’ll take it for now.
  • We’re going to the Trevor Noah show this Friday, and I AM SO EXCITED. He’s pretty much my celebrity crush! We went to his show in Chicago, and it was amazing, so I have high hopes!
  • Even though sick kids disrupt work and routine, I’m so lucky to not be tethered to a corporate job right now. I’m finding that what I do now and the way I do it + the time I get with the kids is a good blend for me at this time. I’m not 100% anything right now, but that works because I love both parts of my life and glad to have them come to life in different ways.

So yeah…things are good! Sometimes they feel hard when I get overwhelmed but honest conversations with close friends and a solid ‘what’s good?’ list set me straight!

If you’re going through a challenging time right now, I’m sending BIG HUGE HUGS your way. Maybe a list will help, maybe a good convo with a good friend, maybe a pity party…whatever it is that you need, take the time and do it because you and your feelings matter.

Sending lots of love!

Life is So Very Unpredictable

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I’ve always been someone who is affected by tragic news to her core. But now, as a mom and a wife, it just hits differently.

Earlier today, I learned about a mom in her late 30s from the Atlanta area who passed away recently, and I can’t stop thinking about her, her husband, and her baby. There really are no words or thoughts that do this kind of loss any justice. It’s tragic and devastating. And so freaking unfair.

The somewhat generic thought I keep coming back to is this…

Life is so very unpreditable.

You can do all the right things. You can eat well and exercise. You can mediate and think good thoughts. You dan be kind and giving. You can be a fun person. An amazing mom. A loving wife. The bestest friend.

But alas life is unpredictable…you just never know what’s going to happen.

I pray that this woman’s friends and family find strength during this time, and that the people she was closest to fill her son’s world with stories about his mama. I hope her soul is at peace.

And for those of us who have been given the gift of more time, I hope we use it wisely. I hope we take care of ourselves. I hope we love our people hard. I hope we don’t leave words or hugs on the table. I hope we never take a single breath for granted. I hope we find ways to let go and just be. I hope we take our big beautiful precious lives and live them to the absolute fullest.

Because…

…life is so very unpredictable.

Sending each and every one of you an abundance of love.

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Life Lately – Winter Break 2022, Sickness, Christmas Plans, and More

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Winter Break 2022 + Sickness

Hello from the land of ‘someone is always sick.’ I believe most of you are right there with us! Sending so much love because…it’s not easy. Thankfully, for us, it’s been manageable, but I know for so many this cold/flu season has meant lots of doctors visits as well as hospital time. Hoping it’s behind us sooner rather than later.

Winter break officially started yesterday, and we were supposed to go to an indoor water park with friends. Kaiden was SO excited. Because he was super congested and had an awful cough yesterday morning (plus I didn’t feel too great either), we decided to reschedule our trip. So thankful we did because he spiked a fever this morning. My mama’s intuition was spot on with this decision.

Now I’m just hoping I can keep him and Mila apart and keep her healthy…

Wish me luck!

Other than that, things are pretty status quo around here. Vishnu has this week off so that’s been really nice (especially with a sick kid!). We’re still sending Mila to daycare on her normal schedule (for many reasons!).

Christmas Plan

What are y’all up to for Christmas? We’re getting together with family at my sister’s place this year (hopefully!!!). And it looks like we’re going to have a Mexican feast for lunch! I can’t wait to spend the day with my niece Layla – it’s her first Christmas!

Parenting Things

Yesterday, as I was sitting with Mila during dinnertime, I thought about how different siblings can be. Everything about Mila is so fierce. When she wants something, she knows how to get it. Looking back, Kaiden was a lot more calm (even though at the time we didn’t think so). Mila’s also a pretty good eater. Kaiden was never a fan of food. He’d much rather talk and play! Physically, Mila surpassed Kaiden in milestones. She’s also a better sleeper overall (knocking on all the wood!). All in all, I still think both my children are nearly perfect in their own ways!

That thought then got me thinking about how kids often feel like parents favor one sibling over another. And to be completely honest, before I had kids, I often thought my parents favored my sister over me (for good reason!). Now that I’m a mom, I don’t think it’s as much about favoring as it is approaching your kids as individuals. They’re unique beings that need different things. It’s impossible and unfair to compare one to another. And as my mom used to say, it’s like picking your favorite finger. Impossible because they’re all important in different ways!

Harry and Meghan

Vishnu and I finished the ‘Harry and Meghan’ documentary. And I will say that it left me feeling for them. I do think they’re both trying to do good things on their own terms. Being royal just complicated that a bit.

The other thought I had while watching is that most people know (from the tabloids) that Harry always did things in his own way. Being 6th in line to the throne, he had more room for that. Why is anyone surprised that he decided to leave everything behind for freedom? It does seem like repairing his relationships with his dad and brother will probably be tougher now, but he likely doesn’t care (hence this documentary).

If you haven’t watched yet, I’d recommend it. It’s not riveting but it does make you think more about celebrities, the media, and the stories that sway us.

Momsanity – Dream, Create, Achieve

Amy and I are so excited about our group coaching program that will launch in January. Look I know times are tough, and thinking about investing in yourself is even tougher right now, but if you have any inclination to join us, I hope you sign up because life is too short to keep putting your dreams and goals last. You will walk away with a vision, a plan, increased confidence, and a renewed sense of fun and joy. AND the best part of group coaching – you’ll be surrounded by likeminded mamas who will be rooting for you and your journey!

Awarify Coaching

And in case you’ve forgotten about my other baby, I’m here to tell you it’s still here and thriving! I have so many plans for Awarify in 2023! I’m going to make it my best year yet. First thing, an internal summit on January 4 (the first day our home will be kidless for a few hours…I hope!) to think through strategy, action items, and plans. I CAN’T WAIT!

Ok, that’s enough updates for now! I’ll be back soon.

I know I say this every few months, but I love this space so much. Long form blogging will always be my #1 way of communicating and writing. I want to show up here more often in 2023. I’m making it one of my goals to write here at least 2-3x a week.

Disney World 2022: Magic Kingdom + Animal Kingdom

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I’ve been sitting on this Disney post for a while now! I thought I’d type it all out before I forget some of the important details.

Ok, first and foremost, some context about our group. We went with two other families, so there were 10 people total in our group – six adults and four kids (7 yo, 5 yo, 4 yo, and 3 yo).

Where we stayed

We rented a house in the Reunion Resort in Reunion, FL. We decided to stay off property because we 1. wanted to stay altogether and not in separate rooms 2. we inserted a ‘free’ day in between our two park days and figured a house would allow us to relax and have fun (we had a pool), and 3. we preferred having a kitchen and buying groceries to eating out the whole time (a big perk was being able to eat breakfast at home and then pack simple lunches for everyone to eat at the park).

The house we rented sleeps 16, so we had plenty of space. The kids slept in bunk beds (boys in one room, girls in another) and each of the couples got a spacious room to themselves. Everyone had their own bathrooms too.

Free day

Before I talk about Disney itself, I have to say that inserting a free day between park days was the best idea because it allowed us to rest, recuperate, and then go hard one more day. If we had done back to back park days, I think our group would’ve been exhausted and a littler miserable. Even though we went in early October, it was still hot, and I was definitely a sweaty mess at times! We spent our day by/in the pool (in our backyard), and it was so much fun!

Genie, Genie +, Lightening Lanes, and Rider Swap

Ok, so this whole Genie/Genie + thing brought up a lot of discussion as we were planning out our days. I didn’t truly get it until the middle of day 1, so don’t feel silly if you’re like, “What the heck is this?!”

I’m going to share a simple analogy that our group came up with…

Genie is a FREE app and it’s like a highway – everyone is allowed, anyone can access, and in fact, it’s sort of must download and use kind of thing. It tells you what the wait times are for certain rides, it has restaurant info on it, it has a map, etc. The Genie app is basically your one stop shop for all things Disney.

Now, Genie Plus is like the HOV lane. You have to pay to get this service. Essentially, you can reserve your arrival time in advance for one ride at a time using the Lightning Lane. Once you’re checked in for a ride, you can use Genie + to reserve your next ride. It’s not AS simple as that, but it’s a great resource to have when you’re trying to do lots of things in one day. Genie + is not free. I believe we paid $15 per person per day for it. I would highly recommend purchasing this for everyone in your party.

And just to add on another layer to this puzzle, there are rides at each park that have their own lightening lane pass. HOWEVER, if you are not staying at a Disney resort, you can only access this via the app at 8 am (not 7 am like with Genie +). At Magic Kingdom, the ride was Mine Train and at Animal Kingdom it was the Avatar ride/experience.

One little hack that helped us with getting everyone on Avatar was a rider swap. So we had six adults in our party. The three girls basically stood in the regular line for Avatar (about 1 hour and 45 minutes long). We rode the ride, came out, and the guys got to go through the lightening lane line (which was much shorter). While we were in line waiting, they took the kids on another ride. All we had to do was let the attendants at the front know that we wanted to do a rider swap. They did something in our app to get everything to register correctly, and we were good to go.

Pixie Travel

Truthfully, I wasn’t involved at all in booking the parks and all that came with, but my friend Samir (and my friend Monica who went in September) worked with Pixie Travel to build our itinerary. If you’re looking to make the planning process more efficient, I recommend checking them out.

Magic Kingdom

Magic Kingdom was the first park on our itinerary. While we were all exhausted after our day at the park, all of us also had a blast!

Here are the rides/experiences we did…

  • It’s a Small World
  • Pirates of the Carribbean
  • Mine Train*
  • Dumbo
  • Big Thunder Mountain*
  • The Barnstromer* (great beginner roller coaster)
  • Tomorrowland Speedway (would’ve been fun except I was leading our lane and got stuck behind a slow poke!)
  • Jungle Cruise (Kaiden and I didn’t go on this one)
  • Stage show (we happened across this at the castle on our way to a different part of the park)*
  • Parade (this was a fun break for the kids/adults!)*
  • Nighttime fireworks*

*The rides I highly recommend!

Animal Kingdom

Animal Kingdom was an absolute blast! We had so much fun exploring and taking in all the different sights and sounds!

Here are the rides/experiences we did…

  • Lion King show*
  • Finding Nemo show*
  • It’s a Bug’s Life*
  • Safari*
  • Everest* (a roller coaster)
  • Gorilla walk*
  • Avatar* (an immersive roller coaster like experience)

Soooo as you can see, I recommend it ALL! The shows are a great way to be entertained and rest your body and/or cool off from the heat. The rides/experiences are just so well done and fun. Even the simple Gorilla Walk we went on while waiting for our lightening lane time was interesting for everyone!

Overall impression

The last time I went to a Disney park, I was a teenager. Going back as an adult, I didn’t know if it would appeal to me as much as it would to Kaiden. But I was so wrong! They really do know what they’re doing. From the rides, to the customer service, to the cleanliness of the park, to just about everything. The magic that’s present and created throughout is so fun.

Misc. tips

Strollers – If you’re renting strollers at the park, which I highly recommend you do, even if you think your kid can walk the whole time, definitely figure out how the strollers work beforehand. And try to do all the adjustments beforehand as well. It’ll save you time when you get to the park.

Dole Whip – Dole Whip is as good as they make it sound! Unfortunately, they were out of the pineapple kind while we were there, but I tried the strawberry, and it was delicious. They also have alcoholic versions…just saying!

Magic Kingdom nighttime fireworks – While this was an amazing fireworks show, and super cool to see at a Disney park, my personal advice is to leave a little early and not stay for the whole thing. You could even position yourself near an exit and watch from there and then jet out. We got out semi-early, and the crowd behind us was insane. Not something I wanted to get stuck in with a tired kid.

Pack food and take coolers – There are plenty of restaurants and fast food type places in the parks, but you can bring your own food and I would highly recommend doing this. We packed PB&J sandwiches, snacks, fruit, and water/drinks for everyone. Hunger could hit while you’re waiting in a long line, and while that’s fine for adults (for the most part!), for kids it’s just not. I’m so glad we did this!

Freeze water bottles and/or any drinks the night before – This was a handy little tip someone shared with us. Freeze water bottles the night before so that when you’re ready to drink them at the park, they’re nice and cold and stay that way the whole time.

That about sums up our Disney trip! Let me know if you have any questions. Happy to help!

Five on a Friday

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It’s been a week, y’all! A good week but a tiring one. That’s mostly due to the fact that I got the latest Covid vaccine and the flu shot on Monday. I didn’t end up feeling horrible or anything like that…just worn out. Butttt…glad to be protected!

In other news, Kaiden’s going on his very first field trip today! I’m so excited for him to have all of the experiences I loved as a kid. I can’t wait to see him after school and hear all about it, or whatever I can get out of him at least!

Now, on to my five on a Friday…

ONE – The Book of Joy

I LOVE this book so much! It’s a simple read in many ways, but it’s also so profound. The way the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Tutu break down the concept of joy is honestly…fun to read. If you’re looking for a non-fiction book that makes you think, feel, laugh, all while making you feel more connected to your fellow human beings, this one is for you.

TWO – The One You’re With

In terms of fiction books, this one was a favorite of mine. I honestly can’t pinpoint exactly why, but it just sat well with me if you know what I mean. The characters, the plot, the twists…all of it came together in a way that just made sense. Again, highly recommend this one too!

THREE – Charades for Kid

Kaiden got this game for his birthday, and he played for the first time when my BIL/SIL visited a few weeks ago. EVERYONE, Kaiden + adults in the house, LOVED it. It made us laugh, forced us to be silly and creative, and made time fly! This is also a great game for kids who need to move. Sometimes, I find that the games/activities where K has to sit for a while don’t capture his attention as much. In that sense, this game is perfect for him. Get it, have fun with your family, and thank me later.

FOUR – 100 piece puzzles

Kaiden got a really cool 64 piece puzzle for his birthday that he completed recently. After seeing him working on it, I bought this 3 pack of 100 piece puzzles for an added challenge. It’s also true that I love puzzles, so this is a fun activity for us to do together. For us, puzzles are challenging and engage our problem solving, and they’re also calming and fun.

FIVE – Kaiden’s profound thought

The other morning, Kaiden and I were brushing his teeth, and I said, “Ok K, after we’re done here, let’s head downstairs to eat breakfast and do your homework (he didn’t finish it the night before).” In retort, he said, “Mommy, I can’t do both at once. I need to do one at a time.”

That hit me hard because, even though I know I shouldn’t, I’m a big multitasker. Kaiden is a lot like me in some ways, but this is one way he definitely isn’t. He’s more intentional and slower. And while he’s still working on his ability to focus (especially on homework), he is able to focus on one thing at a time. It’s annoying sometimes when you want him to move along, but it’s something I deeply admire about him.

So profound and he doesn’t even know it!

That’s all I’ve got today! I hope you have a great Friday and weekend.

2022 – Midyear Review

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In the corporate world, regular reviews/check-ins with your boss are both necessary and required. The midyear review is a point of reflection to look at goals, accomplishments, and all that’s left to do.

Since I don’t have a corporate job at the moment, I thought I’d do a little midyear check-in on this blog. If nothing else, it’s a great way for me to reflect on the year so far!

So far in 2022…

  • We got Covid!
  • My BIL got married
  • Kaiden turned 5
  • I launched my very own coaching business
  • I co-launched a podcast (!!)
  • Kaiden and Mila got their first Covid vaccines!
  • The most exciting one for me by far is seeing Kaiden grow and transform this year. When we first moved to Atlanta, he had a really hard time. Now, he’s super talkative, friendly, open, and somewhat willing to try new things (ha!). He has the biggest heart and is just so loving and kind. He’s the best big brother and is just the sweetest with Mila. Obviously, kids are like moving targets, but I truly love being this boy’s mama and can’t wait to see what the next six months bring for him!

In terms of goals, I didn’t set specific ones for the year, but overall, I started with the world ‘try’ in mind. I didn’t want the fear of the unknown to keep me from new experiences. I also wanted to continue working on my health and fitness and my parenting. All super broad but that’s the general gist.

I’m happy to report that I’ve tried a lot of new things so far this year…

  • Swapping out my stable corporate job for the momprenuer life and Awarify Coaching
  • Launching a podcast with my friend and fellow professional coach, Amy Galvin
  • Pushing myself on the Peloton and trying to break previous records and increase my strength and overall fitness over time
  • Really trying to take a more child centered approach with both Kaiden and Mila. By no means am I saying that we make them the center of our world, but more so, trying to understand their perspectives before diving into my own. Slowing down, doing one thing at a time, and staying as rested as possible helps.

From a friends and family perspective, the first half the year has proven to be a lot of fun. We’ve spent tons of time with family and close friends – dinners, birthday parties, game nights. It’s so hard to coordinate schedules, but we do what we can with who we can when we can. Life is too short to wait for the right/best time. Figure out who you want to spend time with, make that time, and then spend it. New life motto!

From a travel perspective, we haven’t made many moves yet. We had our family of four vacay to FL in May, Vishnu and I went to South Carolina for a friend’s wedding in June, and I’m currently in California visiting my grandparents. We have a few fun things coming up in the next couple of months. It’s not the world travel we were imagining last year, but it’s something and it’s with people we love, so there’s that!

The rest of the year will go by in a flash I know it!

We have…

  • Kaiden’s pre-K graduation
  • The start of kindergarten
  • My sister’s baby coming soon!!!
  • Mila starting daycare (we think)
  • A girls’ trip (for me)
  • A couples’ trip to FL with friends
  • Disney with Kaiden
  • Mila’s first birthday (how?!)

I think my words for the second half of 2022 are going to be ‘breathe, relax, and enjoy.’ Life is moving at warp speed and sometimes I let this overwhelm me. This in turn doesn’t help me be the best version of myself for anyone, so I’m going to try my very best to ground myself in whatever’s happening around me and really be there…soaking it all in like a sponge. Now is all we have anyways, right?

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