As I mentioned in Friday’s post, Vishnu worked a 24 hour shift from Saturday AM to Sunday AM. Up until a few weeks ago, I would’ve stressed about being home alone with Kaiden. I’m happy to report that I now have adequate confidence in my mommying abilities and am able to manage my child solo. 🙂
With Kaiden on a predictableish (not a word, I know, but go with it!) schedule, I sometimes actually find myself with some time to sit and think. This usually happens when I’m too physically exhausted to actually do stuff around the apartment. I just plop myself down on the couch, close my eyes and think. If there’s a notebook nearby, I jot down my thoughts. It’s a nice way to release all the mumbo jumbo in my head. And trust me, there’s a lot of it!
Unsurprisingly, my recent thoughts tend to be more maternal in nature. Some personal, some general, and some stemming from stories/incidents fellow mamas share with me.
So with that, here are some of my recent random mommy musings.
Kissing children on the lips
I’ve recently come across more than a couple of articles about whether or not parents should kiss their children, including babies, on the lips. Why the hell is this even up for discussion? Of course you can kiss your child on the lips. I mean, I get it. If your child is uncomfortable with it, then obviously don’t. Also, I have a 3.5 month old, so what do I know. I’m just going to keep kissing Kaiden until he says no or pushes me away (the saddest day of my life!).
Why do people feel the need to give new moms unsolicited and oftentimes very critical advice? If you have something possibly helpful to share, figure out the best way to do it and then speak. Don’t just blurt stuff out in the middle of a chaotic moment and expect the mom to be ok with it. Thankfully, I haven’t experienced this yet, but a couple of my friends have and it’s freaking ridiculous.
New pet peeve alert! When everyday women look to new celebrity moms as goals. Ummm news alert. Most celebrities have $$$ to spend on help and lots of it – nannies, cooks, cleaners, trainers, gyms, you name it. Those of us in the real world mostly rely on ourselves, and if we’re lucky our spouses, to get stuff done. Like, of course Beyonce ‘bounced back’ after having twins. She can afford to!
Winter is coming
I’m really trying my hardest not to stress too much when it comes to Kaiden. Especially over the little things. But something I can’t seem to chill out about is how to dress him for the Chicago winter. I mean, I know he needs a jacket, hat, mittens, etc. But like how many layers and WHAT EXACTLY should I buy. I had lunch with my friend Erin a few weeks and asked her what she did for her son, and she shared some good tips. I’m going to start there and probably buy more than we need. Oy vey! I’ll be sure to share my purchases in a future post.
Kirkland (Costco) diapers
You guys know I LOVE Costco. After Target, it’s my favorite ‘go to’ store. Everything about it is wonderful – the products, the prices, the samples (ha!). So you can imagine how disappointed I was when we bought and tried the Kirkland diapers and had not one, not two, but MULTIPLE accidents. The online forums are filled with moms who love these diapers, but we hated them with a vengeance. In my opinion, a good diaper should lock in and hold pee/poop so that accidents are far and few between. The Kirkland diapers do the exact opposite because there’s no absorbency factor. I know it’s a little TMI, but in our experience, everything just stays at the surface of the diaper, and it’s not pretty. NEVER AGAIN! The Kirkland wipes, on the other hand, we LOVE!
Google at your fingertips
As a new parent I’m mostly glad I have the internet to either calm or feed my crazy. I find myself asking Google so many random questions throughout the day. For example, I wanted to know the average age of a 50 pound child. Why? Because I wanted to know how long we can use our stroller’s toddler seat. You guys, Kaiden weighs 14 pounds ish and just started using the seat this week. I need to calm down!
Help a mama out
Kaiden’s stroller is kind of big, so naturally, when I take him out on my own, I sometimes have to navigate sidewalks with no ramps, open doors and push the stroller through at the same time, etc. It seriously warms my heart when random strangers offer to help, and I usually come across someone like this every outing. Love it. What I don’t love is when people see you struggling and do nothing. I don’t expect anyone to go out of their way to help me. After all, it’s my baby and my choice to venture out solo. But it’s also rude to not offer, especially when the mom is struggling. So remember, always help a mama out. She’ll appreciate it more than you know!
It’s easy to view self-care as a selfish thing, especially as a brand new mom. I used to (albeit for a very short period of time!). But trust me, it’s not an indulgence, it’s a necessity. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again – happy mama = happy baby. Take a break every now and again and do you for you!
You’re not the only one
As a mom, I can see how easy it is to fall into the trap of thinking you’re the only one. The only one with a baby who doesn’t do/does X, the only one with a spouse who doesn’t do/does X, the only one who doesn’t do/does X. To that I say, relax! You’re not the only one. We’re all more similar than you think. This musing is worth a deeper dive, so be on the lookout for a funny story that illustrates this point perfectly.
So there you have it, a few of my random mommy musings. Feels good to get it all out. Thanks for listening (reading)!