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communication, Personality, and Shame on Me

written by Parita 8 Comments

I find it really interesting how our personalities shine through in the various ways we communicate.  Like really interesting.

For example, I’ve emailed back and forth with certain people for a number of months, made some assumptions about their personalities based on their communication style, met them in real life, and realized that my assumptions were 100% correct.

But let’s be honest.  That shouldn’t come as a big surprise at all.  For most people, their communication style is one way to showcase their personality. Intentionally or unintentionally.

Take this blog for instance.  Most of my readers have never met me, but I guarantee that if they did, they would find that I am 100% the way they imagined me to be.  Just by reading what I write on a weekly basis.

Now I know there are exceptions to this rule.  However, I’m going to make a bold statement regardless.  If you assessed ten people you know fairly well, you would see a very strong connection between their communication styles and their personalities.  There’s just no way around it.

Then why didn’t I make that connection when I received the following text from my husband.

VISHNU: Babe…I have something really important to talk to you about today.

I wait a few minutes to see if he says anything else.  When he doesn’t, I get a little worried and very curious.  No smiley face, no exclamation point…nothing.  So I text him back.

ME: What?  You can’t leave it at that…

Another few minutes go by.  I should mention that I’m out for a run when I get this text.  I stop running and stand on the middle of a bridge waiting for another text to tell me what the heck is going on.  Finally a response…

VISHNU: I’ll call you later. At lunch.  But I absolutely love this program.

SERIOUSLY?!  As happy as I was to hear that his interview went well, I couldn’t help but think, “Why didn’t he use a freaking smiley face or exclamation point in his initial text?  How hard would that have been?”  Here I am staring intently at my phone waiting for another text and/or a phone call because I think something’s wrong.

But I should have made the connection.  Vishnu’s texts reflect his personality – direct, matter of fact and not super excitable.  Of course nothing was wrong.  Looking back, that first text was oozing with [Vishnu] excitement.  After almost 10 years of knowing this guy, I didn’t put two and two together.

Shame on me.

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Written on December 12, 2014 Related:Humor, Marriage

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  1. Kamana@SocialandStyle says

    December 15, 2014 at 11:17 am

    Very insightful!

    I too use “!” and smiley faces. Once I only used one ! in an email and my friend thought I was upset with her 😉
    Kamana@SocialandStyle recently posted…#PowerWomen – Journalist Aarti ViraniMy Profile

    Reply
    • myinnershakti says

      December 15, 2014 at 9:10 pm

      I always think twice before texting/emailing friends and family. There’s always one ! in my message to let them know that I’m not mad. Kind of silly but I think I set my own precedent!

      Reply
  2. Taslim Jaffer says

    December 15, 2014 at 2:58 pm

    I have a hard time sending communication without !! or 🙂 as well…gosh, even my blog’s name has two exclamation points! I struggle when I’m emailing someone for the first time to inquire about a writing position or anything somewhat business-y because I don’t know if it’s appropriate to use those things! Love this post!
    Taslim Jaffer recently posted…Recipe: Toblerone FudgeMy Profile

    Reply
    • myinnershakti says

      December 15, 2014 at 9:08 pm

      I’m the same way! I add and take a way exclamation points 10 times before hitting send! It’s about find the perfect balance. 🙂

      Reply
  3. Sarita @ it's my girls' world says

    December 15, 2014 at 3:57 pm

    HAHA! Yes I would have been in full out panic mode as well.
    Sarita @ it’s my girls’ world recently posted…Girls night inMy Profile

    Reply
    • myinnershakti says

      December 15, 2014 at 9:07 pm

      For a split second, I really thought I was going to cry!

      Reply
  4. Salma says

    December 19, 2014 at 9:54 pm

    I actually never thought about it but you are so right about that. When I write and I don’t use a 🙂 or ! I feel like someone might think there is something wrong. Glad it was good news 🙂
    Salma recently posted…3 Things Thursday – GivingMy Profile

    Reply
    • myinnershakti says

      December 23, 2014 at 3:55 pm

      I am right there with you on that!

      Reply
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