Hi, y’all! I hope you enjoyed Khushboo’s post. And today, I have yet another fun guest post lined up. Sig’s blog is an awesome read – every post is unique and special in it’s own way. I love how she changes her writing style and varies the topics…definitely keeps me coming back for more. Oh and did I mention that she’s hilarious?! Well, you’re about to get a taste of that…
I’m honoured to be writing a guest post for you while Parita is away partying like the wild woman we all know she is at her girlfriend’s bachelorette party.
Trust me, she’ll need the break. I too, attended my friend’s hen’s night a week or so ago.
Too many marriage jokes, too much off-key singing while belting out Spice Girls and WAY too many shots.
Felt like crap the next day, but sometimes drinking vodka and lime out of a penis-shaped straw is exactly what you need.
With that lovely bit of information (and to not give you the idea that phallic shaped objects and me are always intimately acquainted), let me introduce myself properly.
My name is Sugandha, otherwise affectionately known as Sig or Sugar and I blog over at Melbourne Maharani (http://siggysparkle.wordpress.com). I’m an almost-29 year old from Melbourne, Australia and love puppy dogs, healthy living and red wine (not necessarily in that order as well)
(Actually DEFINITELY not in that order. Red wine tops the list).
I’ve also been married for four years and together with my hunky husband Evs for almost eleven years.
In no way am I an expert in marriage, but I like to think I have a possibly-warped idea of a relationship and so I am going to share the top five things that NOBODY told me once the wedding was over. (Kind of like a spin-off on the wonderful marital advice that Parita received earlier)
I like to call this “How to Survive Your First Year of Marriage” (and other stories)
With Parita’s impending nuptials coming up and in the theme of wedding-related occasions, I thought I’d give her once last chance to think it over – especially since this will also be the first time she and Vishnu will be living together.
Oh the fun they will have 😛
If you have ever been married or even in a relationship, these might sound familiar to you, or then again, I might be weird, Evs might be weird and you might already be wondering how long exactly did Parita say she was going to be away again??
1. Have realistic expectations (or pick your battles)
This means that the age-old conundrum of leaving the toilet seat up or down versus to your daily TV viewing schedule to whose turn it is to cook dinner – the rules are different now. Choosing your options wisely may now mean being subjected to 3 hours straight of test cricket on TV to get the vacuuming done. And you know what – it’ll be worth it.
2. Communication is key (or mind-reading is a valuable skill)
Having an hour long conversation on the phone with your sister and expecting your spouse to not only have heard every word but also agree to the decisions made is apparently a no-no. So don’t get shitty at them if they look bewildered when you’re waiting ready to go and they’re still in their underwear.
3. Keep your independence (or don’t forget your friends. You’ll need them. )
So, I’m just going to put it out there. After the first few months (or if you’re lucky, years), the mattress mambo becomes a dance for special occasions. That’s why you need to remember your friends. Only even if to bitch about the lack of lovin’ over drinks. BUT – bonus – you now have a designated driver that can pick you up when you have had too many vodka and limes out of a penis-shaped straw which might get even you some action if you’re lucky (FYI – I wasn’t ).
4. Doing things together is fun! (and if crocheting or go-kart racing is your thing, DO it. And often)
You’re spending almost every waking hour with this other person. So you kinda want to enjoy time with them and you know, LIKE it. But if your other half suddenly gets a sudden interest in gardening or playing computer games for 10 hours straight or any other yawn-inducing activities, it’s totally ok to let them do it alone (See Lesson #3). But find your thing and have fun. Laugh together.
5. Love is a funny thing
Despite the 101 ways he irritates you or forgets to put your clothes away (after putting everything ELSE away) or still wears that shirt from 1993 just because he can still fit into it – they say marriage is a journey on an often tired and weary road. So it’s actually in the quiet moments when Evs and I are snuggled on the couch watching Glee (my choice) or Spartacus (also my choice), that I look over and feel my heart fill with a love like nothing else.
We chose each other on this journey and remembering the many, many memories we have made and will make, makes it all worth it.
Thanks for sharing your wisdom, Sig! You and Evs are so cute!
What’s the one thing you struggled with during your first year of marriage? And if you’re not married, what is the one thing you think you’ll have the hardest time compromising on?
0 thoughts on “What They’ll Never Tell You”
Love Sig’s blog and unsurprisingly this post- I’m not married but was definitely cracking up throughout the whole thing! Whether it’s your spouse or not, living with someone always takes some adjusting and communication is key! If you don’t voice your lack of appreciation towards certain things your fellow housemate is doing, don’t expect them to change it if you don’t tell them how you feel! I also like the idea of a date night once a week/month- a change of atmosphere does wonders for conversation and also keeps the spark alive :)! Hope you both are having a great weekend!
excellent job Khushboo. I agree… especially having a sense of self in a marriage, so vital. Date night is equally important, it is hard doing it once a week, so I like twice a month so there is less pressure. You’re awesome!
Great post Sig!! I completely agree with you on the communication factor, give and take..when to let things go etc. And not forgetting to have date nights 🙂 I’m so single at the moment, at the stage where I kinda hate men…too many jerks dwn here lol I’m not a “man Hiatus”, time for me time this year. Whatever happens happens kinda mind set. Btw, you look so pretty in your first pic 🙂