Monday is here again! I’m hoping the next couple of weeks fly by because I’m expecting a special visitor soon. But more on that when the time comes!
So, in the past week, I’ve had two separate conversations with two different friends that have got me thinking. Both friends and I somehow got on the topic of drawing conclusions about other people’s lives based on very little information and our own perspectives.
By very little information, I’m mostly referring to Facebook. Facebook has changed the world we live in, but in my opinion, not all of that change is positive. My friend told that she read an article the other day citing that a significant percentage of the US population is ‘Facebook depressed.’
People draw conclusions about other people’s lives based on pictures, status messages, relationship statuses, etc. When you really think about it though, these things tell us nothing about someone’s life. I mean, yes, people do post things about their lives, but does any of that truly reflect what someone is feeling or going through at the moment. I would say that 9 times of 10 it does not.
I used to be one of those girls who would cringe every time I saw one of my “friends” change their Facebook relationship status to engaged. And then I would question my own relationship, get emotional, and pick a fight with Vishnu. It was a stupid cycle that I broke well before we actually got engaged, but it wasn’t easy. I had to constantly remind myself that just because people were getting engaged, posting happy pictures, and constantly updating their statuses to reflect where they were in the planning process, didn’t necessarily mean their lives were perfect. “Life isn’t perfect for anyone, Parita,” I constantly reminded myself.
I know people who have cancelled their Facebook accounts because it was truly making them sad seeing other people have babies when they couldn’t conceive, seeing other people get engaged when they just went through a rough breakup, seeing other people get new jobs when they just lost theirs, etc. My friend told me that some of her single friends have a hard time being happy for their friends because they aren’t where the other person is in life. All because of what they see on Facebook!!!
Like I said before, I refuse to let Facebook not allow me to be happy for others, doubt what I have, and take away my happiness. And this coming from an avid Facebook user. It’s just that over time, I came to realize that it give us a very filtered view of life. And you can’t draw accurate conclusions based on a filter.
And the other conversation I had (with my friend Monica) was related to drawing conclusions about other people’s lives based on our limited perspective and our experiences. It’s so easy to assume and to judge, but those assessments really mean nothing because no matter how hard you try, you can’t put yourself in a person’s shoes and feel what he/she feels and think what he/she thinks.
This conversation was important for me because there are so many times when I draw conclusions about a person’s life based on the decisions they make, the material goods they own, the trips they take, etc. But like Monica said, “you really never know what someone is going through and because of that it’s not fair to judge.” And that’s so true because even if people were to look at my life from the outside in, they would never see the negative emotions, the worries, and the fears that sometimes creep into my mind, regardless of everything I’m blessed with.
So, even though some would say it’s natural to do so, I’ve decided to stop drawing conclusions, assuming, judging, whatever you want to call it because for every conclusion I draw, I’m not defining anyone but myself, and that’s not the kind of person I want to be.
What are you thoughts on ‘Facebook depression?’ Do you often find yourself drawing conclusions based on very little information?