Baby Archives - My Inner Shakti

State of Our Household [Month 18]

When you really look at it, motherhood is one big cliche after another. Like where does time go and how is my baby 18 months old?!

If I recall correctly, my last update was when K turned a year old, and so much has changed since then. It’s insane! For one, our little guy is now running around everywhere. He’s also grasping certain concepts that make life a little more challenging and a lot more fun. Personally, I think this age is one of my favorites (so far)…but don’t listen to me because I’ve been saying this every month for the past 18 months!

With that, let’s get to the State of Our Household updates…

STATE OF KAIDEN

I don’t even know where to start with Mr. Kaiden. He has such a little personality. One that truly shines when he’s comfortable, like with our families. Every night for the past 12 or so days (while in Atlanta), he’s been our source of entertainment as we watch him play, imitate us, and run around. SO MUCH FUN!

In terms of some of the basics, he’s pretty much sleeping through the night (7:30 pm to ~6 am (give or take)) with a few hiccups here and there. I always say, it could be worse! In terms of food, he’ll pretty much eat anything when he’s not distracted, but the minute his attention is pulled elsewhere, it’s game over. He does really well at daycare apparently, so I try not to stress out too much, but if I had to pick the one thing that worries me the most, it’s his eating habits. Like I’ve shared before, I can’t help but think about if he’s getting all the nutrients he needs, etc. I’m trying to be chill about going forward because his pediatrician always reminds me that as long as he’s growing we’re ok.

He’s definitely growing with his gross motor skills and physical and mental development. Like I said before, he’s pretty much running/walking really really fast now. He’s also starting to climb on to furniture, which is proving to be challenging to manage because he finds it so fun, and I find it very heart attack inducing. He’s also able to identify quite a few body parts as well as pictures in his books. I love quizzing him!

Another big thing around this time is language development. Kaiden has a handful of words in his vocabulary including mama, dada, nana (which can be my dad or a banana), all done, one more, more, hello, wow, ball, and a lot of other words/phrases that sound like things but may or may not be! My sister told me that in the next six months, his vocabulary will grow to about 200 words, and I can’t wait! His little voice is my favorite.

On a not so fun note, Kaiden can throw a tantrum like no other. Luckily, he gets over it pretty quickly, but man, you can’t always tell when it’s coming. The one thing that really ticks him off is when we say no in a stern voice and/or take something away from him. DRAMA KING, I tell you!

Other than that, Kaiden is such a fun loving boy. He loves to laugh and make other people laugh, and for that, we feel so blessed!

STATE OF MAMA

2017 and 2018 were not easy for me. Motherhood, on the one hand, has been so much fun, but it hasn’t come without its challenges. Most of my challenges revolved around sleep deprivation, Kaiden’s sicknesses, and my own thoughts that often got in the way of my happiness and/or stressed me out to no end. I probably won’t be cured of any of this in the coming year, but I hope to conquer my own mind and ‘come home’ to myself. Forever a work in progress, but progress is the goal.

Other than that, I feel much better and more balanced in general but specifically with work and home responsibilities. I think a lot of this has to do with Kaiden getting older, my ‘getting used’ to motherhood, and letting go of some of type A tendencies. Again, I’m a work in progress, but baby steps are the only way to go.

I plan to share more about my journey and growth along with my ups and downs in 2019. Expect much more unfiltered posts from me!

STATE OF DADA

Like almost all of my other updates, Vishnu’s still rocking fatherhood. Kaiden loves goofing around, wrestling, and causing general mischief with him.

The only thing that gets in the way of all the fun is residency. Ha! The past few months have been challenging with Vishnu’s call schedule and stint in DC, and the next six months will be full of board studying. Vishnu assures me we won’t feel the pain of that too much, but I’m setting my expectations very low because this isn’t my first time around the study block.

I’m hoping Vishnu’s study schedule will force us to be more intentional with the free time we do have. More to come!

2018 was THE fastest year of my life. I can’t believe how much Kaiden has grown in the last 12 months. It’s also hard to believe that in another short six months, he’ll be two!! Here’s to another great month and year!

December 2018 – The One Where Kaiden Took Out the Whole Family

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Oh December 2018, I can’t say I’m going to miss you. Sure, you brought some fun memories, like Vancouver and the holidays, but man has it been a rough ride, especially for our family.

This month will forever be embedded in my mind as the one where Kaiden took out the whole family. Let me start from the beginning…

Two and a half weeks ago Kaiden had a fever which lasted over 6 days and morphed into an ear infection. I was in Vancouver for most of that time, but my sister, Vishnu and dad were around Kaiden quite a bit. And all three of them caught whatever he had. Think cold + cough + fever.

Fast forward to the following week. Everyone was still sick (minus K), and now Adarsh (my BIL) wasn’t feeling too great. I was the last man standing at this point and so thankful for it.

Fast forward again to this past Thursday. The day Kaiden and I left for Atlanta. Kaiden woke up at 6:30 am, which was such a pleasant surprise. I went in to pick him up and noticed his pajamas felt a little damp and crusty. I immediately thought he had diarrhea and woke Vishnu up so we could manage the situation. Vishnu went in to K’s room and yelled out that he had vomited and that we needed to give him a bath immediately. So we did all that and everything seemed ok.

Then right before we were heading out for the airport, Adarsh was getting K ready (putting his socks, shoes, and jacket on) when he vomited again all over our couch.

Again, we cleaned everything and everyone up and headed out the door.

I prayed all the way to the airport that Kaiden wouldn’t get sick on the plane, and thankfully he didn’t. In fact, he slept for most of the flight.

Everything was fine until the next day. And then K had diarrhea. Because we’re experienced with stomach bugs, I did my very best with hand washing and sanitizing. I did not want to catch whatever he had. I told my parents to do the same as well.

Well, no dice because I experienced the same symptoms starting Friday night well into Saturday morning. And. It. Was. Miserable.

I felt ok Saturday evening, and Kaiden seemed to be on the mend too, so we thought all was good.

Kaiden feeling good enough to roll around and make a mess while the rest of us stuffer…lol!

Again, no dice. My mom felt sick Saturday night and went through exactly what I did well into Sunday.

Here’s the kicker. My poor dad, who already got sick in Chicago, got sick again last night with the same symptoms as my mom and I.

I’m hoping we get better before we head to my in-laws’ house on Friday. Fingers and toes crossed!

And that’s why I, along with the rest of my family, am ready to say goodbye to December 2018.

I See You, New Mama

written by Parita 2 Comments

It’s taken 15 months, but I can now see and admit that I often felt lost and alone those first few (6!) months after giving birth to Kaiden. I had tons of support from family and friends, but I was in my own head a lot. Am I doing ok? Is Kaiden big enough? Is he meeting his milestones? What if something happens to Kaiden? To Vishnu? To me? Simply put, I was overwhelmed, exhausted, and constantly questioning everything.

I now know this is very normal. I mean, think about the before, during, and after of new motherhood. It’s intense…to say the least!

Also since giving birth to K, I’ve thought a lot about what I would say to other news moms to [even slightly] reduce their anxiousness around the journey they’re about to start. It’s hard because every journey, every mom, and every baby is so different. That’s the beauty of it, but nonetheless, I would want my new mama friends to know that I see them.

So this one’s for you, new mamas…

I see you, new mama…walking around like a zombie. Ugh, sleep deprivation! Trust me it will get easier. While you may never sleep as deeply again (you know, the whole heart walking around outside of you thing!), your new family will find its own rhythm. And I know it’s annoying when everyone and their mom says this, but try to sleep when the baby sleeps (at least a few times a week).

I see you, new mama…struggling to feed your baby. Anxious if your baby is getting enough milk if you’re breastfeeding. Anxious about pumping and feeling like a human cow. Anxious about offering formula. I see you, and I want you to know it will be ok. You will figure it out one way or another. And take it from me, fed is best. Formula is not the devil. Do what’s best for you and your baby.

I see you, new mama…struggling to connect with your significant other. Vishnu and I have a pretty strong relationship, but it’s definitely changed a lot since Kaiden was born. Pre-baby, we had all the time we wanted/needed to hang out, talk, and do things to strengthen our connection. Now all of that takes a bit more work and energy. In the early days, we were definitely a good team. But there are no practice sessions when it comes to parenthood. You literally jump into the game and play your heart out for the rest of your life. So with that being said, it took a while to figure out what works for us. When to pass the ball, when to run…you get it! Our playbook changes every now and then, but we’re more agile than before. It takes time, my friend. The one thing I can say is communicate, communicate, communicate. Neither one of you is a mind reader, and this new third wheel may throw things off for a bit. But keep talking and acknowledging each other.

I see you, new mama…worrying about the future. This is probably the #1 thing I struggled with on a day-to-day basis. The unknown future. It’s so scary to think about, especially when the most precious thing in your life is a little human who depends on you completely. But I promise, it will be ok. As I like to say now, the future you doesn’t exist yet, but the present you does, so take care of her so she can take care of her baby. And everything will happen as it should in due course. Don’t give away your present joys for the unknown. Take it from me…it’s not worth it.

I see you, new mama…feeling vulnerable. Not only do you now have a new baby, but you also gained a new body and a new mind/brain. Everything is different now, so I don’t blame you for feeling vulnerable. I did and still do to this day. But again, please cut yourself some slack. You grew a human inside of you for 9+ months. You created a freaking miracle. It will and should take 9+ months to get back to you. A new you, I should say. Even though the feeling of vulnerability won’t just go away, you are a lot stronger than you think you are you. You were meant to be your baby’s mama, and you are just who he/she needs. Don’t forget that!

I see you, new mama…trying to be supermom/wife/everything. PLEASE try your hardest to remove this label off your back. I’m not saying you’re not super, because you are. I want you to take that pressure off because you’re human. You will make mistakes, and you’ll learn from them. You will let people down, and you’ll learn to be ok with that (and so will they). You will need to rest, and you’ll learn to ask for help. But only if you remember that you too, like the rest of your family and friends, are a human being. And if this just doesn’t resonate, remember that your kid needs a happy mama, not a perfect one. It’s absolutely a must to throw away the superXXX label and take care of yourself. I can’t stress this enough.

Above all else, new mama, I hope you know you’ve got this! It won’t be easy, but there’s no one better for the job.

My Thoughts on ‘The Maternal Grandparent Advantage’

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I didn’t know ‘the maternal grandparent advantage’ even existed until I read this article back in April. It makes sense on so many levels. However, a lot depends on your family dynamic, your relationship with your parents and in-laws, their relationship with each other, etc.

Before I share my thoughts, let’s review what this advantage is exactly…

According to the articles I read, the advantage stems from the fact that daughters tend to have a closer relationship with their own parents which leaders to a warmer relationship between the kids and their maternal grandparents. Paternal grandparents, on the other hand, have to tread carefully.

Another element to this is that women are still responsible for ‘kinkeeping.’ This includes planning, calls, visits, sharing news and updates, holidays, etc. The wife is the gatekeeper to not only her own family but her husband’s as well.

Like I said, a lot of variables are at play here.

So here’s what I can relate to…

I do have more frequent contact with my parents, specifically my mom (we talk 1-2x/day). She’s my emotional support, my advice giver, etc. My go-to on a day to day basis essentially! We also have a family chat between my mom, dad, sister and I making it easy to just check-in and say hi.

While I have the best in-laws in the whole world (no bias here!), the bond I have with my parents is just unique and can’t be replicated. For example, my in-laws have treated me like a daughter since before Vishnu and I were married. No daughter-in-law business. That said, I’m still there daughter-in-law, and there’s a level of formality that will always be there versus the comfort I have with my own family.

There’s also this element, I think, of Vishnu’s parents having two boys versus my parents who have two girls. It basically boils down to different expectations and relationship dynamics.

That said, I am also the gatekeeper/kinkeeper in our family. If you know Vishnu at all, this will make total sense! Ha!

So yes, I see how the maternal grandparent advantage exists in some ways.

But here’s what I can’t relate to…

Regardless of your relationship with your in-laws, keeping your kids from them is wrong. The only exception being if they don’t treat them well. The way I see it, Kaiden is as much my parents’ grandson as he is my in-laws, and he should have a strong relationship with everyone.

I know it’s easy for me to say because I myself have a great relationship with Vishnu’s parents, our parents are close, etc. But even if I didn’t, I would find a way to put my feelings aside for Kaiden’s sake. Grandparents are such special people, and I wouldn’t want to take that away from him.

I would love to hear other thoughts on this topic because, like I said, it totally depends on your family dynamic. Leave a comment or email me if you’re more comfortable (myinnershakti@gmail.com).

Energy Management + ‘Not Right Now’

written by Parita 1 Comment

I’ve been thinking a lot about how I manage my energy on a daily basis. Personally, it’s important I have enough fuel in the tank (because we all know it’s not unlimited), so to speak, as my day usually starts at 5 am and ends around 10 pm.

Like so many mamas, I give a bit of my energy to everyone and everything – Kaiden, Vishnu, my extended family, friends, coworkers, work, cooking (and everything that comes with it!), cleaning, laundry, exercise, etc. I’d say about 85% of my energy is spent on these people/things/tasks.

The remaining 15% is reserved for me – blogging/Instagramming, downtime, TV time, journaling, reading, etc.

This isn’t an exact science because I have plenty of days where I feel like I have 0 time for me, but generally speaking, this is what my breakdown looks like.

My breakdown also looks different on the weekdays vs. the weekends, days when Vishnu’s around vs. days when he’s working, etc.

The one thing I realized when thinking about all of this is that I have less control over how I spend my weekday energy, as there are some big things that demand my attention (i.e. work!). And honestly, while I’m bone tired by the end of the day, I thrive with a bit of routine, so I’m happy with how our weekdays run.

The weekends, on the other hand, take a bit more work. There’s so much I want to do, but everything is kind of up in the air depending on Kaiden’s nap schedule (one nap or two, 60 minutes or 90?), Vishnu’s work schedule, our must do commitments, the weather (this impacts everything!), etc.

Over time, I’ve realized I’d like my energy to be more balanced during the weekends. Obviously, Kaiden and Vishnu take up a lot of it (as they should), but I’d like to leave more time for free play and exploration for Kaiden, and I’d love to have some leftover energy for me to do more writing. Things like taking K to the park and the museum are super important to me.

With all of this being said, we recently said ‘not right now’ to K’s swim classes. They were taking way too much of my energy, and to be completely honest, I felt a sense of ‘not this again’ every Friday night and Saturday morning.

For those who haven’t taken a toddler to swim class before, let me tell you – it’s a lot of work. Before, during, and after. And this year, a lot of the work would have fallen on me because of Vishnu’s work/interview/boards studying schedule. While I love taking K on play dates and the museum, swim class left me exhausted and a bit frazzled. By noon every Saturday, I’d find that most of my energy was spent.

When my parents were here in September, my mom came with me to swim. Afterwards, she gently mentioned how we may want to consider pushing this particular activity back a bit. For my sanity! When she said that, I felt this immediate sense of relief because deep down I just needed someone to tell me that saying ‘not right now’ is ok. Thank you, mom!

Initially, we wanted to enroll K in swim because it’s an important life skill to have, something we can do with him, and a fun weekend activity. Well, it turns out that a 15 month can’t just learn how to swim, and this is something that can be deferred to age 3. Also, taking away swim leaves time for lot of different activities versus just one.

Another key point here (for me at least) is that with the winters we get in Chicago, taking K to swim every weekend would be a whole lot harder. Just thinking about lugging our winter gear around was stressing me out!

Vishnu was a little hesitant to quit, but when I explained everything to him, he definitely understood. In fact, his exact response was, “Maybe we can sign him up for soccer instead!” Oy vey!

It’s been a little over a month since our last swim class, and I can’t tell you how much more balanced I feel on the weekends now. This just goes to show that sometimes saying ‘not right now’ is the best answer for everyone because happy mama = happy family.

This is all to say that if the way you’re spending your energy is making you unhappy, change it! Say ‘not right now’ to a couple of things, and reinvest that energy into activities that are fun for you and your baby! As modern mamas, we want to do it all (at least I do!), but that’s not realistic and honestly not important. While swim classes sounded like a good idea at first, we quickly realized it just wasn’t the right time. And that’s ok. Your baby’s not going to remember this time anyways, but you will. And I’m 110% sure the future you will want to see a mama who’s energized and happy!

Recent Happenings + Product Loves + Good Reads

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RECENT HAPPENINGS

Maybe you’ve noticed that I’ve been blogging less lately? I’m trying to figure out how to balance MIS the blog and MIS Instagram page. I love writing long blog posts and really digging deep into a specific topic or idea. But recently, I’ve discovered that I also love microblogging on IG, and I really love the community I’m slowing building there as well! I haven’t figured anything out yet, but don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere on either platform. So much relief, I know! HA!

In terms of life events and recent happenings, we’ve had quite a bit going on (well, more than usual) and more coming soon! Vishnu and I spent this past weekend in Traverse City attending two good friends wedding. Since the wedding festivities were on a Friday, we made Saturday an explore and drink wine day. So much fun! And one of the best parts was that Kaiden had the opportunity to spend time with his grandparents. He had so much fun!

This coming weekend, Vishnu’s cousin and his family will be in town, so we hope to spend some time with them in the city. We’re also going to see Hasan Minaj! A few of our friends who’ve already seen his most recent show said it’s amazing with really on point messaging. Woo hoo!

October includes a few big birthday celebrations – Vishnu, my sister, and Vishnu’s brother! It’s also the month Vishnu leaves us for 4 weeks! I don’t even want to think about it. I will say though that knowing my MIL will be here with us to help is a great relief! Also knowing we’ll be in Atlanta for a little over a week in early November is also giving me something to look forward to.

Other than that, our little family of 3 is doing well! Kaiden is just getting bigger, smarter, funnier, and cuter with every passing day! He’s now imitating faces (it’s hilarious!), running/walking REALLY fast, and starting to talk more. He’s still very much attached to me whenever possible, but it’s not as bad as it once was. And honestly, I miss his CONSTANT need for my attention! Vishnu’s busy with work and fellowship applications. I can’t believe in less than a year we’ll know where we’re headed next (or if we’re staying in Chicago). Crazy! And last but not least, I’m doing well too! I feel so much more motivated and excited about stuff than I did just a few weeks ago. I’ve also been keeping up with my workouts (BBG, treadmill, spin) which makes me feel good and on top of my s***. Overall, all good stuff.

PRODUCT LOVES

Mega Blocks – I got these for Kaiden a while ago, and at first, he was all about throwing the pieces around. But as of late, he’s really been into building AND knocking them down. It’s fun to watch him figure out how to connect the blocks, identify colors (sometimes!), and get excited about whatever we’re building. These are a true pain to clean up but worth the joy they bring!

Pacifier clips – My friend Pankti told me about this genius product, and I wish I would’ve known about it sooner. Kaiden is notorious for throwing his pacifier and then crying about it. Now, even if he tries, it ain’t going anywhere! These are truly a lifesaver, especially when we’re out and about.

Summer Infant 3D Lite Stroller – Vishnu and I needed to invest in a travel stroller and fast. Kaiden’s now in a convertible car seat so we can’t really use the car seat + frame stroller method when we’re out and about. We used Summer Infant stroller for the fist time at the museum, and Kaiden didn’t seem to mind it all. It’s easy to use and is pretty generous in terms of space for things other than your baby.

Amazon Basics Packing Cubes – My sister introduced me to the concept of packing cubes, and I haven’t looked back since. These little guys really do keep everything organized, which is always my biggest problem when travelling. This is a must own product if you ask me. In fact, I literally just bought Vishnu a set in black.

Amazon Basics silicone baking mats – I wanted to get silicone baking mats so that I can steam roast veggies for K, since regular roasting isn’t his favorite (yet!). The name brand one was just too expensive for my liking, so I decided to give the ABs one a try and so far so good! If you want to know more about steam roasting, visit the @calebthefoodie IG page for me. It’s a great resource.

Beartown+ Us Against You – This little book duo is freaking amazing! I can’t recommend it enough. If you’re looking for books that grip you from the beginning and take you on a journey with some incredible characters, these two are for you.

GOOD READS

There’s No Love Like the Love Your Kids Have For Your When They’re Small

Five Positive Parenting Lessons From the World’s Favorite Teddy Bear

Have a great week!

No portion of this post is sponsored. However, affiliate links are included. There is no extra cost to you, but I do receive a small commission on anything you buy through my links. Thank you for reading and supporting My Inner Shakti!

Stay at Home Mamahood with Jenny Malik

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If you’ve been reading MIS for the past few months, you know all about my “Diary of a Working Mom” series. It’s very near and dear to my heart because I’m a working mom and these women are my tribe!

But over the past few weeks, I’ve been thinking a lot about the stories I want to share on here, and while working mama stories will always be #1 because that’s my personal vantage point, I want to show the various sides of motherhood and what that means to different people. For example, today we have my good friend Jenny sharing her SAHM story (more on that in a minute). I also have a momtrepreneur lined up to do the same in a couple of weeks.

If I’ve learned anything at all in the past 14 months, it’s this – my mamahood circle needs to/should include mamas from every walk of life, professions, age group, etc. If you want in, I want you here! Regardless of our story, we all have a lot to share and give. And when it comes to the SAHM vs. the working mom debate, it’s not something that should be debated IMO. We’re all doing the best we can for our babies and ourselves. Every mother’s decision is her own, and she shouldn’t be judged for it! PERIOD.

That thought is what brings Jenny to MIS today. So…I don’t know how to give this introduction any justice but I’ll try! Jenny and I have known each other for 16 years! We met my freshman year of college (her sophomore) and it was honestly friendship at first sight. We both ended up majoring in Finance and taking a ton of classes together and the rest is history…16 years of history to be exact.

Jenny’s little boy Noah was born a little over a month before Kaiden, so now we’re sharing the motherhood major as well! Jenny (and her husband/our good friend Jimi) is the most down to earth, funny, and relatable (she’s also #marriedtomedicine) person I know. She’s an open book when it comes to any questions I have, and she doesn’t hide the fact that while this journey is an amazing one, it’s hard! And you guys know, I appreciate that more than anything!

I could honestly go on and on about Mrs. Malik, but I’ll let her do the talking instead!

1. Share a bit about you – family info, pre-baby work life, Jimi’s profession and how it impacts you, etc.
Hi MIS Community! My name is Jenny Malik, my husband’s name is Jimi, and we have a 15 month old named Noah. Prior to making the decision to stay at home with Noah, I worked as a Financial Consultant with CDC on various projects in Atlanta for 7 years, and then switched gears and became an Operations Manager at Raymond James in Albany, GA for almost 4 years. Jimi is a physician who is currently completing a one year Hospice and Palliative Medicine Fellowship at MD Anderson Cancer Center in Houston, TX. We’re thankful because this fellowship has allowed us a little more time together as a family and we hope that the next job will allow for the same. As a Hospitalist Director before fellowship, Jimi worked at least 2 weekends a month, 12 hour day/night shifts, and many holidays,leaving him less time with us. Although the fellowship is busy with weekday and weekend call, Jimi is able to see Noah at the end of the day because he gets off of work at a more reasonable hour so that makes me incredibly happy.

2. How long have you been a SAHM and what prompted you to stay home with your baby?
I have been a SAHM for 15 months since Noah was born in May 2017. There were a lot of different factors that went into our decision for me to stay at home, but I think the biggest one was quality time. Jimi and I always talk about how when we’re on our deathbeds, we won’t say that we wished we had worked more, received that promotion, or made more money… instead, we will wish we had more time with the people we love.

3. Walk me through a day in your life.
There have been a lot of fluctuations over the course of Noah’s short lifetime on what a “normal” day looks like, but our day now typically starts at 6:30/7:00am. Jimi will get ready for work and will be there by 7:30am on most days. Now that Noah is 15 months, he’s a lot more interactive which makes the day go by more quickly and, in general, is a lot more fun. I’ll be honest, newborn days went by really slow for me, but I do miss the cuddles :). We’ll play, read, dance, sing, or run errands when Noah isn’t taking one of his two naps. When he is napping, I’ll try to take care of things around the house or relax for a bit (cook, clean, laundry, vacuum, watch a show, bake, etc.). The evenings get busier because once Jimi comes home from work, we’ll have family dinner, Noah’s bathtime, play/read together, and Noah’s bedtime at 7:45pm. Jimi and I will spend our uninterrupted quality time together after Noah is in bed. We’ll catch up on the day, eat dinner (if we haven’t been able to already) and if we have time, watch something together. That time with Jimi is one of my most favorite parts of the day.

4. In your opinion, what are the biggest advantages of being a SAHM?
I have really enjoyed having quality bonding time with Noah and being able to witness his first milestones. I’m also a bit of a control freak, so I like having the ability to adjust his schedule (as best you can with a young child) in case there’s an off nap or something doesn’t go quite as planned. I don’t feel rushed at the end of the day or on the weekends in that I’m able to get more done around the house during the day so that when Jimi is off, we can hang out as a family and not spend as much time on housework.

5. On the flip side, what do you consider to be the biggest disadvantages?
I have found that I can definitely get bored and miss the social interaction with other adults. Hopefully I don’t lose my ability to talk to people! If you don’t use it, you lose it, right?!? 🙂 I miss being mentally challenged like I was in the working world. I find that I always have to be “on” in that there’s no real break and you can’t leave at 5:00pm everyday. I sometimes worry that I’m not teaching Noah all that I can, or should, be teaching him. Since I’m a first time mom, I find myself having to read or talk to other moms about when kids are supposed to do certain things like use spoons to eat or potty train. There’s so much to teach these little babies!

6. How do you handle mom guilt?
Even though I’m at home with Noah everyday, I still feel mom guilt if I go out without him… it’s unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. In these moments, I try to remember that it’s important for me to have some time for myself and it’s equally valuable for Noah to get one-on-one time with Jimi or family and friends. Thankfully, Jimi is always great about encouraging me to get out and enjoy time for myself.

7. How do you carve out me time? What does me time look like for you? What’s your guilty pleasure?
Although it’s not just “me” in this instance, I love date nights with my boo. I also enjoy a relaxing mani/pedi, baking desserts, girls nights, and watching a tv show or two. I just finished seasons 1 and 2 of Man in the High Castle and can’t wait to see what happens in season 3 this fall! Guilty pleasure – I’ve stepped up my online shopping game since I can’t always get out to the mall these days. Oh those simple joys in life… 🙂

8. What advice would you give to someone considering being a SAHM?
It’s a tough decision to make, but if you’re willing and able to (whether that be financially, physically, mentally, emotionally, etc.), you likely won’t regret the decision to stay at home with your child. You may love staying home and you may not, and either way, it’s okay. You’re still a great mom. At the end of the day, you have to determine what is best for you and your family. A phrase that I’ve heard over and over again since becoming a mom which I have found to be true in my limited experience is – “Days can be long, but years go by quickly.” This saying applies on good days and bad, and I personally am trying to embrace it one day at time. This experience has pushed me out of my comfort zone in so many ways, and I look forward to seeing how our family continues to grow together.

Thanks for the opportunity to share a little bit about my life as a SAHM and the life of the Maliks! 🙂

Thank YOU, Jenny, for sharing your story! Noah and Jimi are so lucky to have you!