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Diary of a Working Mom – Q&A with Anandi Shah

It’s Friday! Finally! I’m back with another ‘Diary of a Working Mom’ Q&A. Today’s guest is Anandi Shah – we connected over the ‘gram. I LOVE her style. It’s trendy and cute while being affordable. I highly recommend following her at HeyAnandi.

Anandi is a busy lady – she works full-time managing a big team, is raising two kiddos, and runs a really fun side hobby/business (again, check out HeyAnandi on Instagram). I think you’ll love her responses because they’re filled with wisdom and a go with the flow kind of feeling.

1. Tell me a little more about your family – number of kids, names, ages.
Hey guys! My name is Anandi Shah. I’ve been married to my husband, Harshil, for almost 13 years and we have two kids – our daughter is 8 and our son is 5.

ell me a little more about your family – number of kids, names, ages.
Hey guys! My name is Anandi Shah. I’ve been married to my husband, Harshil, for almost 13 years and we have two kids – our daughter is 8 and our son is 5.

2. Tell me more about your line of work, role, responsibilities, etc.
I work in the Sales and Marketing department of my organization where I manage a team responsible for license agreement negotiations for our products, as well as supporting and managing our CRM. They’re two completely different roles which require me to put on different hats everyday, but my main role is managing the CRM (executing projects, working with stakeholders to ensure that deliverables are met, etc.). Basically, I make sure our system is running smoothly, projects stay on target, negotiations are managed and my team is happy and willing to come back another day!

3. Walk me through a day in your life.
**DISCLAIMER: While I wish I had a set routine every day (which, trust me, I strive for each new day), my life is a little more like a “Choose your own adventure” book. Especially with two young, strong-willed children in the house and a couple of parents with a million things to remember! In conclusion, we wing it!

I digress…Here’s an example of one of the many types of days we live!** I usually wake up around 6/6:15, shower real quick (under 10 min), wake up my oldest first who is pretty independent, except she needs to be pushed to do things faster (like we all do!). My husband is great and wakes up my son and gets him ready. While they are eating breakfast, I’m getting ready and multitasking to get their lunch out (which is packed the night before, reheated in the morning if needed), water bottles, backpacks, my breakfast etc. Once we’re all ready to go, I drop them off to school which is on my way to work. I try to get to work by 8 but that doesn’t always happen (all depends on how the morning goes. Sometimes I’ll forget something – kids’ lunch, their backpack, my laptop, did I leave my hair thing on, traffic, etc.). Once at work, I’m usually there until about 4:15/4:30, working through lunch if I get in late. If I do take a lunch, it’s usually to go run errands (oh hey, Target!). Then I pick up the kids by 5 (*a mom guilt trigger, my kids always want me to pick them up when their friends get picked up at the end of the school day). Once we get home, it’s dinner, baths, homework and getting ready for bed (pjs, brushing teeth, reading, etc.) Dinners could be anything from leftovers from the night before, something I was able to whip up real quick, a freezer meal, or take out (or on super special days, something my mom made that I was able to pick up during the day since she lives near where I work! *Thanks, mom for continuing to mom <3* )! The kids are usually in bed by 7:30 but can take up to a half hour to fall asleep. I tuck them in and stay with them for a few minutes. Then, I go down to finish off the dishes, clean the kitchen, make lunch (if they’re not buying school lunch), pack snacks, etc. This can take anywhere from a half hour to an hour. My husband usually gives my son a bath, packs lunch some days and makes dinner if needed. Once that’s all done, I’m usually doing things for my insta-blog (could be shopping, engaging on social media, content building, stories, etc) and then I may or may not get the time to watch something (if I don’t fall asleep on the couch -____-). I try to be in bed by 11:30.

4. How has becoming a mom influenced your role at work?
I’m more patient, more understanding, and can empathize a whole lot more. It’s helped me be a better teacher and help manage interpersonal relationships with my team and colleagues. Since I manage people, it’s also helped me be a better manager.

5. What is your favorite tip on how to integrate work and life?
Keep the two separate. When I’m at work, I do my best to give my all to my job. I know the kids are in the best hands possible (after my husband and I, grandparents, etc.). You have to trust that, and if you don’t, it’s time to find new childcare. When I get home, my attention is given to the kids. If I need to check work emails, I check them after they’re asleep. To me, having a good balance means keeping the two separate.

6. How do you handle mom guilt?
My biggest source of mom guilt is probably feeling like I’m not spending enough time with them. So I do my best to spend time with them when we’re together. This also means that all the things I needed to do take a back seat—laundry to be folded stays piled up for weeks, cleaning, running errands. Over the years, I’ve gotten better at giving myself a break. Sometimes, I give myself grace and I’m better at letting certain things go so it’s easier for me—it’s ok to let them be on their iPads a little longer, get that cleaning lady in more often to help with whatever I need, get the grandparents to help more. Do whatever you need to so that you can be happier, and in turn, be a better mom.

7. What is the most surprising part about being a working mom?
When I went back to work after my first maternity leave, it was hard. But after a while, once I was settled into work life, I realized I liked the separation between work and home. Although I was working full time, I needed this “break.” AND I got to dress up again! I’m a strong believer in if you look good, you feel good! And a mommy who feels good can bring that energy back to her kids.

And the most rewarding?
Believe it or not, I’m an introvert. Being at work, I’ve made some good friends through the years, people I enjoy being around (we laugh a lot) which makes coming into work that much better. It gives me a chance to recharge a bit. Don’t get me wrong, I have my days where I don’t want to go to work…we all do. But having a work environment that doesn’t make your stomach turn every morning and one that is flexible to your needs as a working mom (doc appts, events at school, etc) is so important.

8. How do you carve out ‘me’ time? What does ‘me’ time look like for you?
My “me” time consists of different things. During the week, it’s the hour or so I get at the end of the night to either watch a show or do things for my insta-blog (website coming eventually but that’s a whole new ballgame I can’t seem to figure out how to find time for!). Some days, my husband and I tag team and I get to go to the gym straight from work (still working on getting to the gym more!). On the weekends it might be going out with friends or just going for a mani/pedi. Regardless of what it is, my husband plays a huge part on helping me carve out that “me” time. And we BOTH give each other that “me” time—sometimes it’s planned weeks in advance and sometimes just the night before, but we work together to figure it out (sometimes after bickering!).

On that same note, what’s your guilty pleasure?
Ugh, if you haven’t guessed it already—I love to shop! I may need to cut it down a bit, but that’s a topic for another day!

9. What’s your mama mantra?
“We’ll figure it out, it’s going to be ok”—laundry, folding of said laundry, dishes, organizing, getting kids from one place to another, date night, disagreements, getting the house presentable before people come over, finishing that school project that you completely forgot about until Sunday afternoon. If you have a partner that’s willing to figure things out with you, then that’s great because in the end because you’re in it together.

10. What’s the best piece of advice you received when returning back to work?
Start your childcare early! Whether it’s a daycare or an at home nanny, start it at least a week or two early. You’re basically easing yourself into someone new watching your precious baby but you don’t have that added stress of being at work too.

11. What advice would you give to mamas-to-be about returning back to work?
Start midweek. Wednesday – Fri is a lot better than Monday-Friday. And if possible, ask your manager if you can work from home 2 days a week for a little bit (I did that for about 2 months I think), then cut back to 1 (if needed).

Thank you, Anandi, for taking the time to share your journey and thoughts! You’re a true inspiration, and your little family is so lucky to have you!

P.S. If you know someone who is willing to share her working mom/momprenuer story on MIS, shoot me an email (myinnershakti@gmail.com).

Flying Solo with a Toddler

written by Parita 1 Comment

Before I share more, let me set the context for my personal toddler travel situation. Firstly, Kaiden was almost 18 months the first time we flew solo and almost 22 months the second time around. My BIL dropped us off at the airport the first time, which helped immensely. I took a Lyft on my own the second time. A bit of a different experience, but we survived!

I should also share that a lot of how your experience goes depends on your kid. Kaiden is a pretty good traveler. He doesn’t fuss much while we go through the check-in/security/waiting to board processes. He also sleeps pretty easily on planes. The noises lull him to sleep. Ha!

Ok, with all of that being said, I definitely planned and planned and planned for this most recent trip. We were traveling from Chicago to Philadelphia/New Jersey for a family wedding (a 2 hour flight). In retrospect, I thought waaaaay too much about this, but hey, that’s how I prep myself for anything that seems daunting.

I am by no means an expert at traveling with a toddler, but I do have a few tips that could possibly help another parent, so here we go…

Plan out the logistics of your trip well in advance. I thought about everything from how I would get all of our stuff from our apartment to the Lyft to how I would carry everything, including Kaiden, into the airport. You may think I’m crazy, but I also thought about available restaurants in case of a delay. For example, where would I go to get some milk. In my defense, MDW is a fairly small airport!
Choose a family friendly airline (when possible). Personally, I love Southwest because they offer family boarding, and the people are generally nicer and more helpful.
Scale back and bring only what you need with you onto the plane. I brought one backpack/diaper bag, and it was filled with 2 toys, 2 books, diaper/wipes, a few snacks, an extra outfit for K, and my wallet. I find that the more we bring for Kaiden, the more he acts up. Out of sight, out of mind works best for him and us!
Ask for help! I talked to my doorman a few days before our flight and asked if he could come up to help me bring down the suitcase and stroller. I had no shame asking our Lyft driver for extra help. And even though I didn’t need extra help when boarding this time around, I’ve asked strangers in line to help me in the past. No shame in this game!
My final tip is easier said than done, but be confident! You know what you’re doing. It’s scary but not rocket science! And know that there are some scenarios you can’t plan for, so leave those be. Do what you can with what you have! You will eventually reach your destination, so have fun if you can.

I also think the kind of gear you travel with makes it easier (or harder) to navigate the airport. We love this stroller and stroller bag and this car seat and car seat travel bag. These things make everything 100x easier in my opinion. I like that I can carry either item on my back.

So there you have it! Like I said, I’m no expert, but these tips definitely help me prepare for solo travel with K!

No portion of this post is sponsored. However, affiliate links are included. There is no extra cost to you, but I do receive a small commission on anything you buy through my links. Thank you for reading and supporting My Inner Shakti!

7 Surprising Things About Being a Boy Mom

written by Parita 4 Comments

I previously shared that leading up to our gender reveal I was very certain we were having a girl. In fact, I pretty much had Vishnu convinced and excited about that possibility. I was kind of shocked when we cut into those cupcakes and saw blue icing. BOY MOM! My gut instinct was wrong!

I think a huge part of me was nervous about having a boy. I even asked Vishnu later that night, “Do you think I’ll know how to be a good mom to a boy?” Thankfully, he didn’t laugh at me because I was legit concerned!

The minute I saw Kaiden’s face for the first time, every fear I had about being a boy mom dissipated. I just knew this little boy was given to me for a reason. I was meant to be HIS mom!

With that being said, there were and continue to be a few things that surprise me about being a so-called boy mom. I’m sure there are more surprises to come, but here are 7 that never crossed my mind before Kaiden came into our world…

ONE – I knew our bond would be strong, but I never thought it would be this strong. Kaiden is a mama’s boy all the way, but it’s more than that. I feel like I truly get him, and in some ways, he gets me at a much deeper level. Annnnnd other times we’re at odds over what I’m serving for dinner…haha!

TWO – Boy names are hard to come up with. I’ve had a girl name (that Vishnu also likes) picked out for ages. But after we found out we were having a boy, we essentially spent my entire pregnancy going back and forth with names. Vishnu basically vetoed every name on my list, so it was back to the drawing board many, many times. Thank goodness Kaiden came to me when it did!

THREE– Flying pee is a thing. I read about this before going into labor, and what they say is true. A little baby boy’s anatomy lends itself to some crazy pee antics. Pretty much everyone who’s changed K’s diaper in those early days has been a victim to that flying stream. To this day, I’m super cautious during diaper changes because you never know!

FOUR – Boy energy is…A LOT! If we let him, Kaiden can go from whenever he wakes up (the 5 o’clock hour) to bedtime (7:30ish). He never stops moving! When we try to cuddle with him or keep in him in one place for too long, he thinks it’s a game and gets even more revved up! Crazy boy!

FIVE – Clothes shopping for a boy is the easiest thing ever. Tops and bottoms and shoes – that’s all you have to think about. 90% of K’s clothes are from Target, and because he’s in daycare M-F, I don’t get super nice things because they are covered in food by the end of the day.

SIX – There’s no need for expensive toys. At least not for K because he loves playing with my old containers and balls. He’s happiest with Vishnu’s old soccer ball, my Barre3 ball, and a $4 Target bouncy ball I bought a year ago. The more ‘expensive’ toys we own are stored away in his storage lockers. They get air time when we bring them out, and even then, the balls soon take over! I’m sure the era of expensive toys is coming soon, but I truly hope to instill a love for simple things in Kaiden…we shall see!

SEVEN – I LOVE being a boy mom. For someone who was super nervous a little over 21 months ago, I settled into this role much more smoothly than I thought I would. I love all the roughhousing, the sweet mama and Kaiden cuddles, the crazy amount of energy, ALL the ball playing, etc. SO MUCH FUN! Like I said, I wouldn’t change a single thing! Kaiden was meant to be ours!

Honestly, it doesn’t matter if you’re a girl mom or a boy mom. The love is just as strong. And that’s all that matters! 🙂

But I am keeping it real with the flying pee…that’s totally a thing!

MIS is giving back!

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I’ve been blogging for over eight years. MIS started as a place for me to document my life and interests at the time, essentially a hobby blog. Fast forward to today and not much has changed on that front. I’m still very much a hobby blogger, but now my focus is more on motherhood than anything else.

I never really tried to figure out the business side of blogging and how to turn my little piece of the internet into a money-making machine. I was never (and still am not) very good at marketing myself and/or MIS. I don’t like being in anyone’s face, so I just assumed the people who wanted/needed to find me would. LOL! And as far as income is concerned, I make a VERY VERY modest amount from MIS. Like so modest that Vishnu has no clue what I make on monthly basis. Ha!

With that being said, I made the decision earlier this week to donate all of MIS’ advertising income to a new charity every month!

Again, it’s important to note that this isn’t a huge sum of money, but I’m excited to do what I can with what I have/earn!

I was inspired to do this by Modi Toys co-founder Avani Sarkar. I figured if she, a full-time corporate working mom, wife, and entrepreneur, can do all that she does and run multiple Modi Joy charity events every year, I can surely do my part.

Vishnu and I donate to a number of organizations over the course of the year, but I really want my little hobby blog to stand for something more. I want my readers to feel like they’re a part of something bigger with me! Sure, reading my antics is fun (or so I hope!), but how much more fun would it be knowing that your 1-3 minutes of MIS reading was contributing to a cause? 😊

SOOOO…the first organization I’ll be donating to is March of Dimes. I volunteered with MoD in college and have always loved and appreciated what they do for moms and babies. This statement really encapsulates it well!

March of Dimes fights for the health of all moms and babies. We’re advocating for policies to protect them. We’re working to radically improve the health care they receive. We’re pioneering research to find solutions. We’re empowering families with the knowledge and tools to have healthier pregnancies. By uniting communities, we’re building a brighter future for us all.

So I hope you’ll continue to support me and spread the word about MIS because every click, pageview, shout out, etc. counts, and together I know we’re going to give back to some awesome organizations!

As always, thank you for taking the time to read here and follow my life/thoughts. I don’t think I’ll ever fully be able to show how much it means to me but just know it’s a lot! LOTS OF LOVE!

Checking In

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Happpppy Tuesday! It’s been a while since I’ve checked in and shared the random stuff we’ve been doing, reading, eating, etc. Today’s the lucky day!

Fair warning. This post is going to be a bit all over the place. 🙂

Vishnu and I are trying to cut back on the number of toys we get K. Vishnu’s also trying to get rid of some of his current trinkets. With that being said, while I do think less is more, especially for young kids, sometimes I can’t resist and I end up buying something on Amazon. Take these big stuffed balls as an example. Kaiden is OBSESSED with balls, so how could I not hit purchase? And in my defense, they’ve been a hit!

When it comes to books, I don’t hold back! I really want to instill a love for reading in K starting at an early age, and thankfully, my persistent ways seem to be paying off. Kaiden loves it when we read to him! The other day, he brought me a book at 5:30 am. Ha! And while I think all books are great, I wanted to see if K would take to science oriented books, so I bought Hello World! Solar System and the Baby Loves Science Board Book Set. I loved science books as a kid (my favorite one was about dinosaurs), and I still do to an extent, so I figure it’s a win-win for all of us!

And when I’m not reading to K, I’m trying to find time to make a dent in book #5 of 2019, I’m Not Judging You. So far I really like it – it speaks to so many truths in a funny way. Will share more when I finally finish it!

Going back to Kaiden and his obsession with balls, you should’ve seen him at the Children’s Museum this past weekend. The only thing he wanted to do was bowl. Such a big change for my little guy who usually just wants to hold the bowling ball and roll it to me. But this weekend, it got to the point where I had to carry an upset little Kaiden out of that specific area because it was time to go! Such a little character.

In terms of meals we’ve been loving, The Chutney Life’s Instant Pot Lasagna Soup still tops the list. It’s so easy to make and it tastes so damn good! A must make IMO. We’re also loving the Trader Joe’s mushroom and truffle ravioli paired with the kale and cashew vegan pesto. I think K ate like six ravioli in record time!

For those who follow me on Instagram, you may be aware that Vishnu and I are trying to up our salad intake. I’ve been sharing my daily (ish) salad creations on IG, and so far, people have been loving it! All of this started when Vishnu proclaimed that he didn’t want to take a sandwich to work every day. He wanted to go back to the salads he used to take, but this time, he didn’t want me to get the prepackaged kind. He suggested that we make our own! I jumped on the salad bandwagon because I definitely needed to add some good things to my diet. It’s been a few weeks now, and we’re still going strong! Here’s to more veggies and lots of fun salad combos to come.

Switching gears a little bit, my friend Sonal featured me on her blog Coffee & Chai. I wrote a post about what it’s like to raise K as an Indian American, what our biggest priority is, and some of the small things I do on a daily basis to instill our cultural values in him. Give it a read and let me know what you think!

And finally, I just want to share something super small and unimportant. Our cleaning person came on Monday, and it made my day! Our apartment was very crumby and just didn’t feel that clean to me, and by the time she left, it looked like a brand new place. It doesn’t hurt that Nermina is now like a friend and always a pleasure to see! Now to only find a way to keep it this way for longer than five hours!

Ok, enough of my randomness for one day! Have a happy Tuesday, y’all!

P.S. Also, be on the lookout for an exciting blog related announcement this week! Can’t wait to share. 🙂

Diary of a Working Mom – Q&A with Pragati Gusmano

written by Parita 2 Comments

Happy Friday!

I’m so excited to bring you today’s ‘Diary of a Working Mom’ Q&A. Pragati and I have ‘known’ each for a few years now. We met (surprise, surprise) through our blogs and have stayed in touch ever since.

Not only is she super sweet and a fellow #boymom, but Pragati is also a Naturopathic doctor who shares her knowledge about modern wellness and lifestyle medicine in an easy to understand way. If you don’t already, you need to follow her on Instagram – @happyandwell.

Ok, let me pass it over to her to share her story…

Tell me a little about your family.
I have one son, Matteo, who is 2 years old, and three rescue pups ranging in age from 9 years old to 14 years old.

Tell me more about your line of work.
I’m a naturopathic doctor and a functional medicine consultant. My training prepared me to be a primary care physician and my interest is in functional and lifestyle medicine. I love helping patients feel their best by optimizing nutrition, lifestyle and environment. My practice, Happy + Well, is virtual so that I can work with families all over the country. If you follow me on Instagram, I’m always sharing my integrative and holistic perspective when it comes to healthcare and raising children.

In addition to being an ND, I am also a full time functional medicine consultant for a nutraceutical company. I help medical doctors, osteopathic doctors, acupuncturists, chiropractors and nutritionists who want to shift the way they practice to take a more integrative approach.

At home, I’m a busy mom to a 2 year old boy, a wife, a dog mom, an aspiring photographer/videographer and a lover of cooking, crafting and being in nature.

Walk me through a day in your life.
Our morning starts with an alarm at 6:30am. I usually get Matteo seated with breakfast and then start my routine to get ready for work. Breakfast can be hit or miss – sometimes he will eat, other times I have to sit with him and feed him. Lately, we’ve been making protein smoothies to make it easier for all of us to get something nourishing in our bellies before we are out the door. We aim to leave between 7:45-7:55am.

I drop Matteo off at school by 8:15am and then my work day starts. Since I am a remote employee, work for me can be anywhere in Central or NE Florida. I usually have between 2-5 meetings scheduled each day with additional time in my schedule to visit new accounts/doctors who would be good candidates for functional medicine.

Since I’m in my car a large part of the day, I usually pack my lunch, snacks, water and coffee for the road. I really feel like my passenger seat is my office!

Matteo gets picked up from school around 3:30pm by my husband. Depending on my work day, I occasionally can pick him up.

I tend to get home by 4:00pm daily and spend the last hour of my work day catching up on “office” work like sending emails, returning calls and wrapping up loose ends from my meetings that day. By 5:00pm, I’m in the kitchen preparing dinner, which only takes about 30 minutes because I plan a menu in advance and have things ready to go. After dinner, I spend time with Matteo, we hang out in the backyard and play or take a walk. By 6:15pm its bath time, followed by a small snack, stories and bedtime at 7:30pm.

I spend about an hour putting Matteo to bed each night (if you’re a mom with a child who hates sleep, I feel you!). By 9:00pm my day as mom ends and I get to work on my other job – Happy + Well.

I usually take some time to work on content for Happy + Well and follow up with emails. I always try to be in bed no later than 10:30pm. On a good night, I’ll skip working on my side hustle and get in bed with a good book and a cup of tea (currently reading Bad Blood and it is SO good!).

How do you integrate your passion to help others with a full time career?
When I first graduated, I immediately when into a consulting role and I was comfortable there. I think that I’m truly a “teacher” at heart and in consulting, I was teaching other physicians how to use nutrition therapeutically. It was only in the last two years that I decided to become a true “mompreneur” and start a virtual practice. This big shift happened when I became a mom and realized how much value there was to the knowledge I had; I wanted to find a way to share that with other moms and families. While my local community only allows me to reach so many people, the internet and platforms like Instagram give me the opportunity to connect with so many more people who are interested in what I have to offer.

How do you deal with mom guilt?
Mom guilt is probably the worst thing about being a mom! I’ll give an example of something that happened recently because it fully illustrates how I am terrible at dealing with mom guilt:

On the night before Matteo’s first day of school, we were preparing for bed and Matteo was very rambunctious (he skipped his nap earlier so he was likely overtired). He was jumping on the bed and then he took my cellphone. I asked him to put it down so we could get ready for bed. Instead, he threw it behind the headboard and then laid down on my bed. I’ve been trying really hard to show him that actions have consequences, so I told him he needed to go to his room and wait for me there. This set off the biggest tantrum ever, including lots of tears and screaming. Basically, everything fell apart. I tried to comfort him, and tell him we could read a story but he really didn’t want to talk to me or hear what I was saying. I ended up rocking a crying toddler to sleep and I felt so horrible because I thought it was going to ruin his first day of school. It literally kept me up most of the night because I was worried and I was upset that our evening didn’t go as planned. Guess what? He woke up the next morning and said “good morning mommy, I love you” and off to school we went. Moral of the story: the guilt we feel isn’t always reflective of how they feel.

Whether you’re a working mom, stay at home mom, work from home mom or any other variation of a mom, you’ve likely felt bad for something you did or didn’t do. The thing that keeps me going in knowing that children are forgiving and resilient and all they really need/want is love.

What are your guilty pleasures?
I love alone time! I totally took that for granted before becoming a mom. Now, a few minutes to myself really recharges me. Other guilty pleasures include: champagne, brunch with girlfriends, a good spa day and quiet time to read a book.

What are your favorite hacks, tips, and tricks for how to get the most out of your day?
Be proactive! I find that if I review what I have going on the next day the night before, my day goes so much smoother. It helps me to organize what I need to have ready for myself and Matteo, it gives me a preview of my work schedule, and it allows me to not feel rushed or panicked in the morning.

I also find that packing lunches right after dinner clean up is the biggest time saver for me. That way I’m not rushing around the kitchen in the morning trying to figure out who is eating what for lunch that day.

And finally, having a weekly menu planned for dinner. This streamlines my grocery shopping so that I’m only buying what we are going to eat that week. It also gives my husband a heads up on what’s for dinner and it makes coming home from working and preparing dinner a lot less hectic.

Thanks for sharing your journey, P! And thanks for all the knowledge you drop. I know it’s helped me a ton!

The Great Pacifier Disappearance + a Positive Unintended Consequence

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If you follow me on Instagram, you know that we FINALLY got rid of Kaiden’s pacifiers. What I thought would be this long drawn our process ended up being something we did in a day, and just like Vishnu said, K adjusted just fine!

You might be thinking, “How hard can this be? Just stop giving your kid a pacifier.”

Well, on one hand, you’re absolutely right. It should be that simple. Except in our kid’s case. He was obsessed with those things. To illustrate my point, imagine this. Kaiden needed 3 pacis at all times. One for his mouth and one in each hand. If the one from his hand slipped through the rails of his crib and fell out, he would wake up screaming. Never mind the fact that the one in his mouth was still there. Oh man! It got to the point where Vishnu and I had to put together a plan and set a date. And then Vishnu aborted the mission and just took the pacis away while I was at a Soul Cycle class. I came home and was a little upset with him because no paci equaled no nap that day.

BUT, to my husband’s credit, everything worked out just fine. That night, while Vishnu was giving K a bath, I literally threw away every pacifier I could find (fingers crossed I found them all!). When it was time for Kaiden to go to sleep, we walked around the kitchen and showed him they were gone and gave him his Curious George doll to hold instead. Because he was so exhausted, he fell asleep right away. He slept through the night but woke up at 4:30 am. A similar pattern occurred the rest of the week. He would go to sleep just fine but wake up between 4-5 am. I. Was. So. Tired.

He’s still waking up in the 5 o’clock hour, but we’re trying a few things to push that back a bit. We’ll see if we’re successful. If not, I’m just going to chalk it up to the fact that Kaiden, unfortunately, got my early bird genes!

One note – while we went with the cold turkey approach, a lot of parents end up cutting the tip of the pacifier little by little until it becomes useless OR they poke holes in the tip until it stops doing its job. We went with cold turkey because of the whole paci in each hand thing. And Kaiden really is an out of sight out of mind kind of boy.

As far as the unintended consequence from this whole thing goes, I think getting rid of his pacifiers has made him a tiny bit more independent and less needy. Instead of asking me to hold him all day, he actually plays on his own and entertains himself 10x better than he did before. I have no idea if these things are related, but both Vishnu and I feel that the pacifiers enabled more whiny behaviors. Now that he can’t attach those things to his mouth all day long, he’s breaking other attachments too. But don’t worry, I still force my kisses on him!

If you’re at a point where you feel like the pacis need to go, just go for it! It might be painful for up to a week, but kids adjust so quickly. I was telling Vishnu how I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders now that we just did it. He told me to thank him! HA!