Parita - 2/170 - My Inner Shakti

Weekend Rehash – Lots of Park Time

Another weekend in the books! This one was productive and fun…and very tiring with lots of time spent at the park!

Let’s get to it…

FRIDAY

After dropping Kaiden off at school, I went to my second to last Soul Cycle class. It was a tough one with lots of resistance.

I then went home, got ready, and headed to Trader Joe’s and Target. I know it probably sounds kinda boring to revisit the same places every Friday, but I love the consistency. It’s actually fun for me.

After all that, I came home, put on some makeup, and did a fun IG collab thing. I’ll share when it’s live!

I then made my way to the kitchen and prepped a few things – a gnocchi bake, an Instant Pot chana saag, and some white bean muffins turned into bars (SOOO GOOD!).

The rest of the afternoon/early evening was filled with random to-dos and after-school fun with K…at the park of course.

After Kaiden went to bed, Vishnu and I settled in to watch the Big Bang Theory finale. OMG. I cried like a baby! Personally, I loved how they ended the show. It was so heart-warming and perfect!

SATURDAY

I needed to make a Costco fun for gas and a few other things. I didn’t get to that on Friday, so I decided to take a little field trip with Kaiden. Here’s the thing about my guy. He loves being out and about. He’s an observer and is always so happy and calm when we’re shopping, so it’s actually fun for us.

After coming home to put on some sunscreen, we headed to the park. You guys, it was sweltering out. I was a sweaty beast by the end of it all. And to paint a quick picture of how wonky this weather is, imagine this…I had to wear my 30-40 degree jacket on Friday.

So you would think after all that activity Kaiden would want to take a nice long nap, right? NOPE! He fought every attempt, until I finally just laid in bed with him. Not his crib. The twin we have in his room.

If there are any mamas out there with good nap time strategies, please share them with me!!! Kaiden is a good nighttime sleeper, but he fights naps like crazy (he’s fine at daycare).

After nap time, we headed to my sister’s place to hang out and eat dinner. Her in laws were in town and made pav bhaji for all of us. I can’t say no to an Indian mom’s home cooked meals!

SUNDAY

Sunday was half marathon day for my sister and BIL, so we woke up, ate breakfast, and headed out to watch them finish.

A couple of notes – my umbrella, which Vishnu claimed is hurricane proof, definitely isn’t. It started raining on our walk to the park, so I took out my umbrella only to have it flip inside out a few times. Thank goodness it stopped raining!

Anyways, we missed my BIL and friend Mehul cross the finish line but got to see my sister! So fun being the cheering squad, although it definitely got me thinking about possibly running a half some time soon (ish!).

Kaiden and I walked home (rain free!), made pit stop at the park, and then headed back home for lunch and nap time. I don’t know if it’s because he was more tired than he was on Saturday or because Vishnu put him to sleep, but he definitely napped in his crib without too much fuss. Maybe I’m the problem!?

ANNNNDDDDD…the rest of our day was spent inside because of the rain. Until we went to the park again at 4 pm. HAHA! I can’t wait until summer finally decides to consistently show up!

That’s our weekend in a [long] nutshell! More details than you probably wanted to know, but the more I think about sharing these kinds of post, the more I want to capture the little details of K’s childhood. He’s only this little once!

I hope you guys had a great weekend! Here’s to conquering a new week. 🙂

How We Almost Booked the Wrong Vacation

written by Parita 2 Comments

Vishnu and I are fairly intelligent humans. In some ways, he makes up for what I lack and vice versa. Nice little balance we have going on here.

Well, you would think that two smart people would be able to book the right vacation…

Let’s start from the beginning.

Vishnu has a week off after he takes the boards, so we decided to take a relaxing trip to celebrate. My parents are flying up to watch Kaiden, so this is ultimately our time to recharge. Originally, Vishnu wanted to go to Bora Bora. Well, turns out a week isn’t enough time for a vacation on the other side of the world. I asked Vishnu if we could go to a Caribbean island instead. Maybe pick a smaller one and splurge a little on where we stay. He was disappointed but agreed that was the best plan B.

We then went back and forth on where to go. We recalled a conversation we had with a couple while honeymooning in Turks and Caicos. They told us all about this must-visit, remote island that you have to take a ferry to, etc. We both took mental notes and said we would definitely visit one day. Well, one day was June 2019 and we were going to…Antigua…

I started looking at options and resorts, but something didn’t feel quite right. First of all, you can fly directly to Antigua, and I didn’t see anything about ferries. Also, Cheap Caribbean and Costco both have vacation deals there, so how remote and exclusive is the island really. But I still went ahead and found a beautiful place for us to stay in Antigua.

That night, as I was showing Vishnu the property, I noticed a link for Anguilla on the Cheap Caribbean site. Hmmm. That sounded a bit more familiar, so I did a quick Google search. Lo and behold…the island that fit the description we were basing our whole vacation on is ANGUILLA!!! He looked a little confused, so I explained the feeling I had this whole time and how I think Anguilla was actually the island that couple talked to us about. It’s like a light bulb went off in his head because that’s what he remembered too. After a bit more research and learning that the link on Cheap Caribbean is outdated as they don’t currently have vacation deals there (but a true blessing for us!), we changed courses and booked a trip to Anguilla (on our own and not through a site or agent).

When I think about how we almost ended up going on the wrong (yet still very beautiful) vacation, I’m equal parts amused and horrified! Lesson of the year – TRUST YOUR GUT! That nagging feeling is there for a reason. Listen to it!

I can’t wait to go on a tropical beach vacation and do nothing but eat, read, drink, sleep, lay on the beach, and spend time with my hubby!

Final thought – don’t ever ask us to plan your vacation. You will likely end up in the wrong place! HA!

Weekend Rehash – Date Night In, Play Date, Mother’s Day

written by Parita 1 Comment

Ok, so after much back and forth (in my own head), I’ve decided to bring back the weekend rehash/recap type posts. I REALLY enjoy reading random posts about our weekends from 2013 (or whenever), and I think I’d be sad to not have any documented with K.

With that being said, I’m not going to share every little detail, but I thought it would be fun to talk about what we did, what we ate, etc. Nothing too crazy, but I know my little mama heart will love reading about this season years from now. So humor me!

FRIDAY

My Friday started with a Soul Cycle class. Man do I love this workout! Sadly, I only have two classes left in the package Vishnu got me back in September. As much as I love it, I won’t be signing up for more right now. For one, it’s EXPENSIVE! And two, my gym offers cycling classes that are a decent substitute.

I also ran my usual errands (Taget and TJs) and did a little bit of meal prep. I made Ministry of Curry’s Instant Pot Batata Bhaji (Potatoes with onions and spices) and the Lean Green Bean’s White Bean Muffins. I give both recipes 5 stars!

After picking Kaiden up from school, we headed to the park for some time in the sun! While it’s not quite summer here in Chicago, I’m trying to enjoy whatever warm weather we get because who knows what’s going to happen next!

And finally, to wrap up Friday, Vishnu and I had a little La Croix and cheese date night. This is one of our favorite ways to do date night in because we both LOVE cheese, and it gives us a nice opportunity to talk over a shared plate of food! I picked a few goat cheese varieties because I’m still on that ‘I think cheese makes me breakout’ train. But because I love sharing this experience with my husband, I indulged a little! We need to do this more often…so fun!

We moved our coffee table to storage when K started crawling, so we had a picnic in our living room while watching Netflix!

SATURDAY

The highlight of our Saturday was a playdate with our friends Pankti and her cutie patootie Arjun! Pankti and I caught up and talked all things career, motherhood, and life while the boys kinda sorta played together.

To be honest, the rest of our day was just ok. Kaiden ended up napping in the car on our way home (even though I tried to time our trip home before his usual nap time), which threw him off for the rest of day. He was super cranky and ended up getting frustrated with himself and us every other minute.

Oh well, these are the days of our lives… 😊

SUNDAY

Mother’s Day! Sunday was a good day filled with a special gift from my guys along with a very heartfelt card, a delicious brunch, and lots of Kaiden snuggles, hugs, and kisses!

Again, we didn’t time our walk home from brunch as well as we should have because Kaiden fell asleep in his stroller for about 20 minutes. We tried to transition him as carefully as possible to his crib, but that was a huge fail. So again, he was thrown off for the rest of the day, but my little bubs did better than I expected.

And that was our weekend in a nutshell! I can’t wait to read back on Mother’s Days in the future to see what we did in 2019. 😊 Hope you had a wonderful weekend, mother or not.

Let’s Talk Career and Motherhood

written by Parita Leave a Comment

A few weeks ago, when I asked my Instagram followers what they wanted me to share and blog about, a few people mentioned stuff around career – why I chose what I did, what I love, what I don’t love, the future, etc.

Today, I’m going to share more about my current job/career, how it supports me as a working mom, what I love, and what I wish was different.

This is me speaking at a conference in Vancouver last December

Background info

This will likely mean nothing, but I’m a Senior People and Culture Manager for a global professional services organization. I’ve been with my current company for just about seven years now. In those seven years, I’ve not only been able to work with really amazing people on some cool global projects and initiatives, but I’ve also been able to take my career with me as we moved around for Vishnu’s (from Miami to St. Petersburg (FL) to Chicago.

Working mama support

On the working mama front, everyone I worked with, especially my boss at the time, was super supportive – both when I left on maternity leave and when I returned. Speaking of maternity leave, I was able to take 16 weeks under my company’s policy, which obviously wasn’t long enough, but I know how lucky I am compared to some. And as I’ve talked about in the past, upon my return to work, I was (and still am) able to start back on 4/10 schedule where I essentially work four 10 hour days and get Friday off (to do all the things I can’t during the week/weekends). This alone has helped me maintain some degree of sanity, so while my Fridays aren’t always relaxing, I do love my high level of productivity. A good way to go into the weekend!

What I love

First and foremost, I love the people I work with. They are the #1 reason why I’ve decided to stay here.

I also love project management, which is a large part of what I do. And even better, I get to do it on a global scale. On a given day, I could be working with our firm in the UK, the Philippines, and Argentina. I get to travel the world without leaving my desk!

Now that I’m a mom, I also appreciate that I can pretty much do my job from anywhere, and that I don’t have to travel too often. I’m also lucky in that I have the option to work from home a couple of times a week.

I also love where my office is located. On the days I do go into the office, I love that I can walk to work. I don’t know how this happened (I strongly prefer warm weather), but unless the temperature is in the teens, I’m walking. Chicago will do that to you I guess!

What I wish was different

Honestly, from a working mom perspective, this is the ideal role and company for me. But given that I’ve been here seven years, sometimes I itch for something new. New company, new industry, new problems to solve, etc. Then I look at my what I love list and think otherwise!

My two cents

Whether you’re a work outside of the home mama or not, when it comes to career, I think taking a big picture view is important. Know what your priorities are and align your decisions to those. And know that things shift. Life is made of different seasons. Some seasons are filled with work travel and long hours, while some are more about balance.

As I’m learning over time, your career isn’t black or white. There’s some gray. But mostly, it’s what you make of it and how you frame it for yourself and the season you’re in.

Mindful Meditation Mama – Tejal V. Patel

written by Parita Leave a Comment

You guys! I’m SO excited to share today’s post with you. If you’ve questioned your life purpose, thought about your mission, or wanted to change career paths, today’s post is for you.

This one is from Tejal V. Patel, a kids mindfulness expert/a mindful parenting coach/a mama meditation mentor/an Ayurveda + yoga specialist…and so much more! Tejal is such a beautiful person and soul. We’re never met face-to-face, but I just get such a great feeling when reading her posts, watching her videos, and chatting with her via IG DM! Her message is powerful and impactful, and it will change the way we parent, the way mamas feel about themselves, and the world. You heard it here first!

With that, let me hand it over to Tejal to walk us through her journey…

Wait you’re a divorce attorney who turned into a mindfulness advocate for moms and kids?

I’ve learned the follow-up question people ask me is a clear indicator of where they are on their spiritual journey…

Wait, what do you do?

Wowza, That’s soooo awesome!

Why the heck would you leave a career where you make alootttt of money?

OMG I wanna leave my career to pursue my passion too – tell me everything!

And the classic — what did your parents say when you left your career to pursue your “hobby”?

Hobby? What the… no, my friend, this is my life purpose.

My dharma. The reason I was put on this earth. And the way I’m currently being called to serve.

It’s why at 13 I didn’t tremble when I spoke in front of 200+ people.

It’s why when I meditated for the first time at the age of 6 I can still remember the message that came through to me.

It’s why a shy, super, sensitive and empathic child, who could feel spirits and had an intense intuition was given these gifts.

So I can walk this path of spiritual teacher… mindfulness coach and motivational speaker. And hopefully someday a published author (fingers crossed).

Most people are surprised when I say I didn’t get much resistance from my parents when I told them I was leaving my law career to become a kids yoga teacher.

Mainly because they had many signs and inclinations throughout my 29 years that I was an out-of-the-box, beat to my own dream, free-spirited soul.

Of course, it was not easy to gather the confidence to sit your parents down and tell the people who sacrificed their whole life, saved for so many years and paid an exorbitant amount of money on an education you’re going to renounce.

But I think it’s harder for people who don’t know me as well to understand why I decided to take the path less traveled. Like my in-laws. “Attorney” is an easy way to define what I did. It brings prestige with it. A lot of money. It gives people an image that I’m intelligent.

But a yoga, mindfulness and meditation educator? How do you even describe that?

And worst…what will people think?

In a society where the most widely accepted belief is that happiness, success and worthiness is determined by your grades, degree, how much you make and what others think, saying you are going to break the norm from the trifecta of the “safe” doctor, engineer or lawyer mode is hard for some to understand.

As a recovering perfectionist and people-pleaser, I’ve learned through experience that the things we feel insecure about, others will naturally match that energy and our uncertainty is reflected back to us in the form of people asking judgmental questions or confronting statements that mirror our fears.

Over time when I unapologetically owned my path and was confident about my choice, I noticed that fewer people would bring the “Why the heck would you do that”attitude and I was attracting more supporters, more people who were trying to fulfill their own life purpose and more clients who wanted to work with me.

As for the naysayers that do occasionally show up, I can authentically speak my truth, proudly own my journey and not feel concerned about their opinions of me.

I think one of the biggest misconceptions we have about our life purpose is that our job, our 9-5 or what we do most hours of the day, is our life purpose.

Yes we spend most of our waking hours at our jobs whether you go to work, work from home or motherhood is your full-time gig.

But here is the thing.

Our life purpose isn’t about what we do. It’s about who we want to BE in this life.

Work is only a small part of our life purpose.

Our life purpose is how we choose to show upin the world.

Ask yourself “How do you want others to feel in your presence?” And go BE that person.

For me, my life purpose is to be authentic and vulnerable. I want others to feel inspired, empowered and to feel their own inner light when I shine mine.

So it doesn’t matter if I’m coaching, speaking in front of crowd, at the gas station, doing an Instagram story or in the trenches of motherhood, I fulfill my life purpose when I embody those intentions.

Even if you don’t love your job, you can still fulfill your life purpose. Trust you are exactly where you need to be in this moment and you can always make the choice to spread light in any place you are.

So even before I left my career I started to BE the teacher I desired to be.

You see, I didn’t leave my law career overnight. It was gradual. It started with teaching kids yoga and mindfulness at the pre-schools we own a few days a week. Then to writing articles. Making Youtube Videos to publishing articles on bigger sites and eventually having a few go viral. That’s how organically my coaching career began.

That’s when I left my career.

But there was faith. Trust. There were no guarantees. It required surrender. It was a daily commitment to show up and be a blessing in the life of another. And an unwavering belief that we all have a mission, gift and purpose only we can bring into the world.

When you tap into the energy of who you want to be, the Universe realizes you mean business and will meet you where you are. New opportunities pop up and you are guided on a path to help more people.

Many people think life purpose and our mission is the same thing.

I believe our mission is a constantly evolving way of showing up in the greatest way possible to help us fulfill our larger life purpose.

And we don’t have one mission in our life. As we enter different phases in our life, our mission changes.

This “aha” moment came to me when I was watching the Best Exotic Marigold Hotel when a British retiree travels to India to live at a newly restored hotel, only to take charge and run it. Even in the last phase of her life, she found a new mission.

So don’t let age, resources, environment, location or money ever prevent you from believing you have a powerful mission in this world.

Look at Marianne Williamson who is a spiritual teacher who spent most of her career as an author and spiritual teacher who is now trying to run for president.

Or Oprah who went from news anchor to having her own talk show to doing spiritual shows like Super Soul Sunday.

In my decade of being an entrepreneur my mission has shifted countless times.

Starting as an attorney with my own law practice to creating my own kids yoga company to running large group coaching programs online to creating my own mindfulness curriculum I share with teachers and educators in schools and universities—my path is consistently changing and evolving.

My current mission?

Help moms build stress resilience and empower them to raise the first generation of mindful children and next generation of peace leaders.

But my most important mission at the moment…

Being a mom raising two emotionally balanced and mindful young boys, who help me hone my craft of being a present, patient and peaceful person everyday.

Above all leading by example.

So mama, let me leave you with this.

Never in a million years could my parents every have dreamed when I was a child that I would grow up to be a kids mindfulness teacher, a mindful parenting expert, and an Ayurveda and yoga teacher.

As we raise the next generation, let’s set the intention that we don’t ask our children to become who we dream of them to be. Let’s give them the freedom to discover their gifts, find their own life purpose and do work that we could have never dreamed of them doing.

If mindful parenting, building stress resilience, achieving mind-body balance through Ayurveda or finding inner peace through meditation is something that calls to your heart, join my #ModZenMama tribe and start your mindful mama journey with me at www.TejalVPatel.com. I’d be so honored to connect with you!

THANK YOU, TEJAL! Your post brought tears to my eyes. I love your philosophy and you! Thank you for all that you do. Can’t wait to see where the Universe takes you next.

Morning Routines: Let’s Talk About Them

written by Parita 2 Comments

A little over a month ago, I shared our evening routine. To bring some balance to that post, I’m sharing our morning routines (*plural because it varies depending on lots of different factors!) today. Stick with me here, mornings are a little variable for us!

*A few notes: everything depends on the following things – if I’m going in to the office, if I have an early morning call, and what time Vishnu has to be at work/what rotation he’s currently on. Regardless, we try to leave the house between 6:50-7:05 to drop K off at school.

So with that end game in mind, here’s what a *typical* morning for us looks like.

5:30 am – On days where I’m working from home, I wake up at this time because I don’t like waking up to a crying baby. I like to have a few minutes of silence to pray, brush my teeth, and change for the day.

On days where I go in to the office, I’m up by 4:45-5 am depending on what I have to do to get ready – shower, straighten my hair, etc.

6-6:15 am – Kaiden is up sometime between 6-6:15! He’s been waking up a little later the past couple of weeks. While his entire routine was thrown out the window during the wedding we attended a couple of weeks ago, it did seem to reset his internal clock. Hoping 6 am (at the very least) is our new normal!

6:15-6:25 am – Kaiden and I sit on the couch together (he’s usually snuggled in my lap) and give him some time to wake up. This is my favorite part of our morning routine!

6:25-6:35 am – Breakfast! Recently, K hasn’t shown much of an appetite, so I usually give him a small piece of fruit, some cereal, and milk. He gets a second breakfast at school which he usually eats all of, so I don’t worry too much about this. This also gives me a few minutes to make mine and Vishnu’s shake and prep Vishnu’s (and mine if I’m going to the office) lunch (usually a salad).

Morning routines — The only picture I managed to snap. Probably because we lost power this morning which threw things off a little! Here’s to agility and working with what we have!

6:35-7:00 am – During this time, either Vishnu or I (depending on the day) will change Kaiden’s diaper, get him into his school clothes, and brush his teeth. Then we run around getting our stuff together for the day.

7:05 am – We’re out the door!

So that’s our morning routine in a nutshell. Of course, one little thing can throw us off, but generally speaking this is how we operate!

Your turn – what’s your favorite part of your morning routine?

What’s in a [Middle] Name?

written by Parita 4 Comments

I’ve shared how hard it was for me and Vishnu to agree on a boy name. I had a 5 year old spreadsheet with about 10 names that I liked, and my husband vetoed every single one of them. And then he had the audacity to suggest the name Sawyer. Now don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with the name Sawyer, but Vishnu knew I would never agree. Crazy man!

Anyways, I digress. Once we agreed on the name Kaiden, I brought up the whole middle name thing. For some reason, Vishnu was okay with me selecting it, so we went with Shiv. I’ll explain more about why in a minute, but let me back up and explain how this whole middle name thing works for us.

In Gujarati tradition, when you get married, you take on your husband’s name for your middle name. All of your kids are also given your husband’s name as their middle names. So for example, my mom, sister and I all had my dad’s name as our middle name.

And on the other end of the spectrum, Vishnu doesn’t have a middle name. The whole name thing works a little differently for South Indians. I don’t want to misrepresent it, so I won’t go into details. Vishnu’s family isn’t very traditional in this sense, so it’s not all that complicated. But no middle name for him.

When we got married, I decided to make my maiden name my middle name, dropping my dad’s name. My sister kept her full birth name and tagged on her husband’s last name. To each her own!

When it came time to decide on Kaiden’s middle name, I picked Shiv because it’s the name of a Hindu god, and for some reason, that was important to me. Also, with Kaiden being a modern/non-Indian name and our last name being very long and traditional, I wanted something simple with an Indian feel. I also love the flow to his whole name when said together – it just works!

Even though I didn’t get my top boy name pick (or my 10th!), I’m glad Vishnu let me select K’s middle name. Otherwise, we would’ve ended up with Sawyer for sure!

Your turn – does your culture or family follow a certain naming convention? Is there a story behind your name – first or middle?