I was talking to one of my best friends the other night about boys, and we were discussing how they really are different from us girls. VERY different. And with Vishnu being my first serious boyfriend, it took me a long time to learn that lesson. Just ask him!
Over the years, I’ve learned a few things about boys that I believe hold true for most but not all. Ok, fine…just Vishnu, but I really think most of my observations could apply to 99% of the male species. I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments section!
The top four things I think we girls need to remember are actually pretty simple. If I had to sum up my list in one phrase, I would say “Boys aren’t all that complicated.”
Let’s get started…
1. Sports are a priority, especially around football season.
I don’t think this one requires much explanation, but I do have a funny story to share that illustrates my point perfectly. My best friend and her boyfriend were driving to dinner one night, and as they pulled into the parking lot, he realized that he had an hour to complete his Fantasy Football draft. Instead of going to dinner, they quickly found a Starbucks nearby so he could complete his draft. I think the whole process ended up taking a couple of hours, and my friend was pretty livid. When they were telling me the story, I couldn’t help but crack up because I too have learned that sports are a priority – football, soccer, basketball, you name it!
2. They don’t notice your “imperfections” so stop pointing them out.
I think women do a really bad job of letting themselves feel good about their bodies and the way they look overall – me included. I can’t tell you how many times Vishnu’s complimented me, with my response inevitably being, “Gosh, I feel so big right now” or “I wish my stomach was flatter.” I NEED TO STOP! We all do. If your significant other compliments you, say thank you and show him your beautiful smile.
My favorite Vishnu story related to this is from when we were in undergrad and had just started dating. We were lying in bed talking one day and Vishnu asked me why I had a lot of freckles on my cheeks. I told them those were actually acne scars. He just shrugged his shoulders and said they were cute. I love him!
3. Their memories really fail them.
For the longest time, I could not wrap my head around the fact that Vishnu remembered the most miniscule detail about a football game from 1999 (see #1), but when it came to something about our relationship, he would “just forget.”
Over time, I realized that this is how he is. And I also realized from talking to my girlfriends that a lot of boys are the same way. I think one reason it tends to be this way is because I don’t talk in short sentences, and oftentimes, my real message is embedded in a detailed 20 minute conversation. I’ve gotten better about this though and so has he. I’d even go out on a limb to say that sometimes Vishnu’s memory is better then mine. It took 6 years though.
So, for all of you out there in new relationships, give the guy a break and some time. He’ll come around!
4. They don’t like to “play games.”
When I say “play games,” I don’t mean flirting and having fun with “the chase.” I mean the whole, “nothing’s wrong” or “it’s fine,” when you clearly know what’s wrong and that it’s not fine. I still play this game sometimes, and I think it’s the thing that irritates Vishnu the most.
Trust me, it’s better to just get your feelings out on the table, or say that you need a few minutes/hours to blow some steam and then talk things through. Holding things in and hoping you stop feeling upset doesn’t work. And as Vishnu always reminds me, boys aren’t mind readers. Say what you need to say, ladies!
And again, I’m not trying to generalize, but when I look at all of the boys I know, I find that most of these hold true. And I’m glad Vishnu’s not like me in a lot of ways…it makes our relationship fun and…interesting!
What do you think? Do these hold true for the boys in your life? Any other big points you would add to this list?